This Will Probably Kill You tbh and You Will Cry Blood With This
by TheLesleyBetsieWrites
Summary: So Tris lives and there's FourTris babies, I think. Also, you are going to die while you read this. You have been warned.
1. Find You

**Okay, before you rant about the name, I wasn't actually clever enough to come up with a good name and the amazing people that helped me proof read this and encouraged me to upload it sooner than I wanted to helped me with the title. So yeah, shout out to my awesome friends, flashyfactor and BeBrave236 on Twitter for being so rad and supportive and they have no idea what's in store for them in reading this fic anymore than any of you who read it do. I wanted to tell you about Four in this fic; I felt compelled to explore a tender, more softer side of him because I bet he would become precisely this if Tris would have lived. If you have any comments or want to ask me anything about this fic, you're more than welcome to message me or through Twitter tinycophine because I'm in hella fandoms and I changed it. Enough talk and enjoy! (Or hate, because that's what's probably gonna happen anyways.) Lots of love and stay rad xo**

A wail pulls me from slumber. I struggle to rub the sleep from my eyes single handedly. My other arm is being used as a pillow by Tris. She lifts her head - a small, light yellow tangled haze surrounds her face - without opening her eyes.

"I got it." I say thickly. I clear my throat. "Go back to sleep, Tris."

I get up slowly, not wanting to do it, but knowing I have to. Natalie needs me, and she could wake up Will. If she does, this will be a long night. I rush over to the next room, hoping to quiet down my beautiful daughter before she gets to her brother and, later on, to her mother.

"Hey, Natalie." I croon softly. She loves it when I talk to her like that. Immediately, her cries die down, and I see her struggling to find me in the darkness. "Daddy's here." I groan a little, a private joke for myself, because she isn't close to being heavy. "Come to papa." I don't need to fumble for her. Something as precious as her can't be messed with, and I hold her softly in my arms. "It's okay. I have you." I keep whispering, throwing love and protection and warmth onto her with just words. She's not squirming or crying anymore, and I smile. I walk out of her room, and head for the living room. I keep walking, cradling the precious, tiny baby in my arms. At least Will's not awake too. How do you handle two crying babies at the same time? I don't want Tris to wake up too much, so I'm the one to usually take the nights. I can feel Natalie settle into some sleep. I let out the smallest sigh; she didn't put up a fight. I also realize I won't need to walk around to lull her to sleep. My eyes begin to get drowsy. I can't fall asleep on my daughter. I walk over to the couch and lay her on my chest, near my heart. I put my hand over her. She rolls around too much, so this is a precaution to keep her safe during her sleep. I can never be 'too safe' for my children. Not when they're concerned. Before I know it, I'm asleep too.

I wake up to the sound of the frying pan hard at work. The smell of fried eggs wafts through the air. I grin, straining my neck to find her.

"Where are you, Tris?"

"Kitchen." A short reply. To others, it may sound like she's angry, but I can hear the smile in her voice. She's not angry at me; she's mocking me.

"What's so funny?" I play along. "Why are you laughing, Tris?" That's when she comes over, and before I know it, snaps a picture.

"Because you should see yourself." Tris is stifling her laugh, a hand over her mouth. She turns the camera to me, a gift from Caleb, and I see what's funny. I look like I got attacked by an angry bird - at least, my hair does. The curls look insanely tangled. I'll be needing a haircut soon. But that's nothing to how Natalie looks. She's too small in my arms, even for her age. Like a puppy. She rises and falls along with my chest as I breathe. I put my hand through my hair, causing Tris to laugh even harder. "Stop it, Tris." But I have to admit we look ridiculous. I change the subject quickly, putting the attention away from my horrible hair.

"Is Will up yet?" A shadow passes across her face, but it leaves just as quickly. I recognize it for what it is. Pain. Then her eyes light up. She nods, small tears escaping her eyes. They light up with not only happiness for having children, but they also shine with tears from the pain of not being able to share this joy with her parents or some of our friends. I can. Except I don't want to. I mean, I can't say Evelyn is a better person, but she's not bad. The thing is, if I take my kids to Evelyn, something tells me I'll have to take them to Marcus too. And I don't want my children anywhere near that monster. To me, he will always be that hollow man - the man who nobody truly knew who he was except for my mother and me. And Tris; after walking alongside me in my fear landscape.

"Well, go get him." I struggle to avoid a silence that will only make Tris sadder. "He could start crying." She nods again, both of us ignoring her tears. Maybe if we try hard enough, it'll be like they were never there. It doesn't work. I get up slowly, not wanting to wake up Natalie. I transfer her from my chest to my arms in one swift motion, and then sit up in the couch, contemplating on whether I should take her to her crib or if I keep her in my arms. It's not a complicated choice. Tris' eyes are still red when she comes back, but at least she's smiling now, and her smile widens when she sees me with Natalie. I'm playing with my daughter's hand, and when I put my little finger on it, she grips it tightly. I let her hold it, not wanting to disturb her sleep by pulling away my finger. I hear Tris laugh.

"It turns out Will went back to sleep. You should put Natalie down before we eat. She's better rested when she's in her crib. Plus, we have to eat breakfast before we get to work."

"I know, Tris, but I love holding her. Can't you tell?" Tris laughs more at my answer. But she's right. Natalie sleeping longer and I get to eat breakfast in peace all into one? I can't turn this golden deal down. "And how did you manage to beat me in waking up before me and making breakfast?"

"I didn't. You overslept." I look at her, wide eyed. "And before you get angry at me, Four, I'm gladly going to remind you it's our resting days. Our work today is to clean the house and take care of the kids."

I take Natalie to her room and set her down before she wakes up. "Okay." I grin, resuming the conversation. "Then let's enjoy breakfast." I sit down as Tris puts a plate piled with eggs in front of me. It's weird to think that we can eat all we want now. Even though the faction system has been eradicated, letting go of our previous beliefs is complicated. If it was hard in Dauntless, it's harder now. We get to choose what we eat; nobody tells us anymore. Besides burgers and cakes and muffins and some other select junk foods, we really haven't gotten to try anything else. Especially Tris – she spent less time in Dauntless that I did. For now, we enjoy simple food, like eggs and chicken. Uriah makes fun of us for being too Abnegation. We usually ignore him and feed him extra chicken just to make fun of him.

It's a competition. I finish eating before her; but before I can even pull off so much as a smile, two small cries emanate from the twins' room. I get up and rush to their room before Tris can look at me. Both Will and Natalie are officially awake. I sigh. In the past couple of months, I've been reminding myself to get used to my children's cries and other noises, because they've become more frequent and active. It's hard considering I'm never going to get parenting advice from my still alive parents. With almost two years of helping Tris take care of these babies, I still struggle when I hear them cry, or see Tris stressed out because they need to eat, or they haven't slept, or they need a shower. I want to help as much as I can, and be good at it too.

I pick up Will and pat him in the back. Natalie sees me and quiets down, but puts her arms up. I go to her crib, and since its morning now, she can see me without a problem. She's smiling at me when I put my arm out. I shift Will, and this way, I can carry both. Natalie climbs my arm, but I take my time, always cautious with my children. I sit on their rocking chair, and it groans with our combined weight. Well, it actually groans under my weight, but still. I'm not sure if they're supposed to eat now or go back to sleep, but Will's already settling on my shoulder and Natalie's gripping my other one tightly. I push my feet lightly, and we begin to rock back and forth. It's enough to put anyone to sleep.

Tris finds me rocking them back to sleep fifteen minutes later. "You left me with the dishes, Four," I know she's angry with me because she only calls me Four when she's angry, pretending to be angry, or when she's mocking me. And each time, I know exactly how she's using it. "And you know it was your turn to wash them today."

"They were crying." I sigh. "You know I hate it when they cry."

"You pamper them too much." Her voice softens.

"I'm sorry." I whisper.

"No, no, that's alright." She smiles widely. "Are they asleep again?"

"Maybe." I say slyly. "Why?"

"Just asking." She's about to grab Will when she looks at the time. "Oh, no!" She says it too loud, and covers her mouth. Too late. Natalie squirms and Will starts to kick. "It's because they're supposed to eat. I mean, I think they are. Remember how their doctor said they need to eat to get used to breakfast and wake up hours because of their age and…" She says it all so fast, in a hushed voice, tears peppering her eyes.

"Hey, it's okay. Tris!" I don't scream, but I am loud enough to get her attention. "We have to do this slowly, okay?" I look at her and she nods. "You're a great mother. You don't need to worry. Now, here's Will. Come on, let's do this together." Before she can speak – or cry, for that matter – I pass our son onto her arms and lead the way out of the room. I motion for her to put Will on the couch and I take care of them as Tris makes them cereal. I don't want to do that yet. I feel like I'll get it wrong. And I can; I could burn the milk, or mix the ingredients the wrong way, put the wrong cereal flavor.

While I wait for Tris to come back, I wake them up softly. I begin by tickling Will, the heavy sleeper. His giggles wake up Natalie, and soon all three of us are laughing. I make faces at them, and Natalie tugs at my curls while she tries to climb around the couch. Will falls onto the couch pillows and then does the same thing his sister is doing. I try not to yell as they pull on my hair. "Alright, you little monsters, I'm going to kiss you to death." I start to tickle them again, and soon, their bellies are exposed, and I'm blowing raspberries on them. Their loud laughter reminds me of the kids that ran around the Dauntless compound, near the Pit, where nobody bothered to look if they were safe or not. But here, they are safe; my children are safe because they are here with me. I kiss their noses and they laugh at the sound, so I start making noises again. I end up on my back, and Will is crawling on my stomach as Natalie refuses to let go of the curls. I turn from loving father into unexplored mountains, with high unclimbable peaks (my legs) and tickling monsters (my hands) at every corner. We're loud and joyous. This is what a family is supposed to be like. Not Marcus.

"Oh, God. Tobias, they could get hurt." Tris almost drops her cereal bowls as she finds us all sprawled around the living room.

"I'm not saying I'm not being careful, but stop overreacting, Tris. You know I won't let anything happen to them." I smile. And then groan. "Ow, Natalie, this is getting out of hand." She's attacking my curls again. "Tris, I think I need a haircut again."

Tris is laughing now, worry temporarily forgotten. "That's what you get for doing what you're not supposed to."

"Let's just feed them. I think Natalie wants to walk today." With that said, Tris and I sit on the floor, our legs crossed, while Natalie and Will crawl around, and come back to either one of us to get a spoonful of cereal. We're done feeding them with laughter and encouraging words that I ask Tris something. "I thought you would have your camera out, considering you're recording everything they do. Even when you're changing their dippers."

She gives me a shy smile, something I haven't seen in a long time. "Don't mock me, Tobias." But she gets up either way and runs for the camera. Just as quickly as she turns it on, and goes to video, Natalie does what I had a feeling she would do sooner or later. "Oh, God, Tobias, look." Tris says with tears in her eyes. And I wouldn't believe it even though I'm right here myself. Natalie stops, looks at her hands, and slowly starts to get up. Will looks at Natalie.

"Nana?" He asks. And she cocks her head to the side, her body language implying 'Why not?'

"Ill. Up!" She tells him. I laugh, proud of my children. They're having a conversation. I find it hilarious that Natalie refuses to say Will's name correctly.

By now, they are up, but they aren't walking; they're balancing. I look over at Tris. It seems she won't stop crying. Ever since our children were born, she's never stopped crying. I kiss her softly. "I love you, Tris Prior. Thank you for this beautiful gift." I gesture to our children. It occurs to me that I need to marry her now, and if I do, she won't be a Prior anymore. I'll be her family, and she'll be mine; just like that promise a long time ago. I'm suddenly grinning too broadly.

"Papa!" Natalie and Will say it at the same time. They hold hands, and together, make their way towards us. They begin slowly, uncannily aware that if they go too fast, they could fall. When I extend my arms, they've already tried to walk quickly. The living room is ever so big, but with them learning to walk, it will become something new. Unmarked territory, so to speak. They fall onto me like domino pieces, and Tris is both laughing and crying at the same time and all I can do it hug my children and kiss them and be proud of them. I'm not saying it's harder for Tris, but it's complicated. She needs time, so I'll give her some.

"Go kiss your mom." I tell them. "Hey, Tris? Could you pass me the camera?" She gives me a nod. They walk up to her and kiss her tears. It is both beautiful and agonizing, and I choke back a tear or two myself as I see Natalie and Will trying to understand what's happening to Tris.

"Mama?" Which just causes Tris to sob violently. "Mama!" Now they're all crying. I stop recording and hurry in putting the camera away. I come back to Tris kissing their foreheads with an immense ferocity.

"Okay, babies, I think you've stressed out your mother enough for today. You gotta go play in your room. Who wants to go first?" I don't even get to finish my question, because Will is already reaching for me. "How about we walk, huh?" He nods, smiling. He might have understood some of what I said. I put his feet on top of mine, and we're off. He's having too much fun by the time we get to his room that he doesn't want to get off.

"Papa, more!" He yells with delight, and when he looks up at me, I can't resist saying yes.

"Think we should go get your mother and sister?" I ask, but I'm already thinking of a way to cheer up Tris. Yes, our children make her cry, but more importantly, they make her smile and remind her of who she can become; for them, she can – and will – become anything. "Tris Prior!" I scream wildly and Will joins me by yelling 'Mama' every time I say her name. Back in the living room, Natalie has joined our crazy chant. Tris starts to smile, even though she's using a tissue to blow her nose and wipe her tears. "Tris Prior, how about we forget about the cleaning and talk about something more important."

"And what could that be?" She's mocking me now, again.

"These beautiful children of ours need some motivation to walk. So I say we put them on our feet and walk around. The first one to give up loses." I smirk, daring her to forget about our problems and concentrate on what makes us happy. Our family. I can see her thinking about it. "Oh, come on. Your family needs you. We need you. Right guys?" Some understanding gets to the twins and they both, miraculously, say yes. "You can't say no to these highly manipulative babies." I keep on smirking, enjoying how I can tease her.

"Alright. If you lose, you're sleeping on the couch for a week." She picks up the game pretty quick.

"And if I win?" I emphasize.

"Easy. You clean for a whole month."

"And how is that even a reward?"

"It's a reward because when you clean, you don't take care of the kids."

"Then I'd rather take care of the kids."

"Then you better hope I win."

"Not a chance."

I forgot we're all still in our pajamas, so Tris and I go around carrying the kids with shorts, tank tops, and socks. We spend the entire morning goofing around with the kids, and the only reason why we even stop is because someone knocks on the door of the house.

"I won!" Tris screams wildly. "Tobias Eaton is going to be sleeping on the couch for a week. I need to write this down!" Natalie squeals along to her mother's happy screams.

"We lost, Will. Can you believe we lost? God, we were so close." I laugh when I see Will's face. His mouth is in a perfect O. He's shocked. "Okay, little guy, we have to see who it is." I pick him up and groan. My back feels like it could break any second. But I was having so much fun, I'm only noticing now. "You got lucky, Tris. Saved by the bell!" I tell her as I open the door. Standing on the threshold are Uriah and Christina.

"You just woke up?" Christina asks, while at the same time, Uriah's confused. "Saved by the bell? What the hell is that supposed to be? Did we interrupt something?"

"No, we've actually been up for hours. We were playing with the children, and we lost track of time. Tris won this game we were playing because I was the one who answered the door."

"Who is it, Tobias?" Tris yells from the kids' room. "I need you to bring Will to me; he needs to be changed."

As if on cue, Will begins to look for Tris when he hears his name. "Mama?"

"I'll take you to her. I'll be right back. Come on in, you're in your house." But when I say this, I can't look at Christina. We'd decided the kids' names a while ago, but the last time Christina was here, Tris was still pregnant. It's not because she doesn't want to come often. It's just that because of her demanding job, she can't come as often as she'd like. Natalie's in a yellow dress that has a bubbly red print when I walk in. It reminds me of the Amity. "It's Uriah." I say, tense.

Tris smiles a little. "Why so tense? Is it bad Uriah is here?" Then she turns serious. "You haven't fought with him or anything, have you, Tobias?" She asks as she takes Will and begins to change his shirt.

"No, no, it's not that. And when we fight, it's us joking. It's never anything serious. But Tris..." I stop her midway of changing Will's pants. "Christina is here, Tris."

"But she never comes. And she calls when she does. Besides, her last visit was two years ago. I mean, I was still pregnant."

"I know, but she's here now."

"She heard me, didn't she?" Now I'm not the only one who's tense. She goes back to putting Will's pants on.

"Yeah, she did. But I couldn't look at her. We'll explain. She'll understand. I'm sure of it." I say this because I truly believe she will. Christina isn't one to hold grudges against Tris. They're too close as friends. And they've been through so much, their loyalty towards each other is unwavering.

Once we're all changed, including myself and Tris, and we head out to the living room, Natalie reaches for Uriah and he starts playing with her while Tris rushes to the kitchen and prepares lunch. I sit with Will, both of us feeling uncomfortable under Christina's stare. "Would you...?" I start awkwardly.

"May I?" Christina looks ready to cry, her eyes wide.

"Will? Be nice to Aunt Christina, okay?" I make a serious face, and Will is serious too. He nods, and I hope he understood me. "He might be heavy, but he likes to talk a lot. It's mostly just babbling, but he can get intense about. If he makes you uncomfortable, just hand him over to Uriah and carry Natalie. She's easy to carry. I'll be right back." I look back to the living room when I'm at the door of the kitchen. Uriah's on the floor, chasing a screaming Natalie around while Will is 'talking' to a shocked Christina. "I came to help you." I scare Tris. "Hey, are you okay?"

"Yes." She's making chicken sandwiches. That's something new. "Help me with the bread?"

"Yeah." We work silently and quickly. We can hear Natalie's giggles and Uriah's roars. Tris smiles, but she's still tense. "We'll be okay. I promise."

"I know. I just didn't think this would come so soon."

"So soon? She hasn't been here in nearly two years. And we would have had to face this eventually, Tris. I think this is the perfect time."

"Well... you didn't kill him."

"That has nothing to do with this."

"Yes, it does." She going to cry again.

"Stop." I say, a bit harsh. "Don't do this to yourself, Tris. I know this is hard for you, but I'm here with you, to help you through it. Don't do this, please." I kiss her hard, holding her face until she kisses me back. It doesn't take long. "Together, okay?"

"Thank you."

"You're strong." I smile at her.

"What's next? 'Be brave'?" A small smile is tugging up the corners of her mouth.

I grin. "Maybe." I put the finished sandwiches on a plate and help her build the rest. "Come on, we've got Christina and Uriah to feed." I take the plate of sandwiches to the coffee table near the window. Tris gets the chairs and I get the pitcher of water and some cups for all of us.

Uriah, same as always, begins to joke around. "Abnegation food again?"

"Shut it, Uriah. Did you come to eat, or criticize?" I tease him back. "Unless you want to cook?" That comment makes Tris fully smile.

"No, he would burn the whole house." Tris' sarcasm gets us all to laugh. Well, all of us except for Christina. We have to keep talking. I don't want to keep this terrible silence going.

"Yeah, and if you burn the house, we're would we live?"

"Hey, Four, not that I want your house to burn, but you're kinda insulting me here. If I do burn your house, you can come live with me." Uriah says that like it's no big deal, but I can hear the sincerity in his voice; I couldn't be happier to have a friend like him. He keeps talking. "Umm, Four, your daughter keeps saying something, but I've got no idea if it's good or bad." I smile, because the only person who calls me Tobias is Tris. Everyone else finds it hard to do it, so 'Four' has stuck around.

"What do you mean?" I walk over to him as I see Tris walk over to Christina. Apparently, Will started asking for her. "Did she cry or something?"

"No, but she just says the same words over and over." Natalie's standing up on Uriah's legs, but she moves around until she's sitting.

She points at me. "Papa!"

I laugh. "Yeah, that's me."

"Calm down there, Four. Your smile's getting too big for your face." Uriah's jokes and teases never stop. I ruffle his hair and push his head lightly. He laughs, which causes Natalie to laugh too.

"Nana." After she stops laughing, she points at herself and says her name. Will nicknamed her well. I grin as I understand what she's doing. Thanks to Tris, my kids are too Erudite. Oops, I'm not supposed to think like that anymore. It's hard to let go. I'm about to explain to Uriah what she's doing, when she points at him. "Uuh." I chuckle, but she's not done. "Ra!"

Uriah gets it then. "Oh. She's saying our names! Is she trying to say mine too?"

I nod and call Tris. "Hey, Tris, come here. Natalie's got something to say. Oh, and get the camera!" I says as an afterthought. Tris, Christina, and Will – in Christina's arms – come to us quickly. "Listen to her."

At first, Natalie's shy. We're all gathered around her. Tris is about to turn off the camera when Natalie starts to talk. "Papa." A tiny finger points at me. "Nana." She points at herself. I hear Tris gasp. I wrap my arm around her waist and kiss her forehead. "Isn't she wonderful?" I whisper to her. Tris nods. Everyone else, except for Will, who has no idea of what is going on, is staring at Natalie in amazement. "Wait for it..." I tell Tris. Natalie finally points at Uriah. "Oh, God." I hear Tris' voice shake. "Uh. Ra!" Natalie grins.

It comes out sounding like 'you are' but Uriah grins and lifts Natalie above his head. "Yep, Nana, that's me!" Then he starts tickling her again. Too much laughter is making her cheeks turn pink. I look at Tris. She's crying again. I'm going to pretend it's the post-pregnancy hormones. The doctor told me that Tris could still be sentimental and emotional a couple of months after the pregnancy. It would wear off. I'm still giving her time. She can do this on her own, I know she can. She turns off the camera and goes to put it away. Uriah's frowning, but not for long. Natalie keeps him busy.

"You're going to eat?" I ask Uriah, to speak over the silence.

He shakes his head. "No, this kid of yours demands too much attention." He sets Natalie on the ground and she crawls to the couch. "Though I'll eat afterwards. Thanks, Four."

"Hey, Christina, are you going to eat?"

"Yes," she answers in a distant voice. Then she snaps out of it. "Are you going to eat, Will?" Her voice catches, but Will grabs her face between his little hands and looks at her straight in the eye. "Will?" Christina's voice cracks. He's still grabbing her face, but he turns to me.

"What?" I ask him.

"Who?" He ask me in return.

"Oh, that's your Aunt Christina." I tell him, as I sit next to them in the couch.

"Tina?"

"Aunt. But, yeah. That's her name." Will takes his hands off her face. I smile. My kids are full of surprises today. I'm used to them talking, but not this much. I remember their first words. I cried more than Tris that time. Christina is smiling but crying at the same time. "Oh, no, not you too."

"Thank you." Christina tells me, her voice broken, ignoring the tears that keep running down her face. "Thank you so much. He's beautiful. And so much like my Will. Thank you and Tris." Tris comes over and sits next to me.

"I couldn't figure out a more perfect name for him."

"You're right," Christina says, finally wiping away her tears from her eyes. "It's fitting."

"Well, I could have also been Erudite, so yeah." Tris jokes.

"See, this is why the kids are too smart, Tris. I thought they would come out throwing knives but instead, they come out talking." Uriah and Tris laugh at my comment, and Christina cracks a smile.

"They should be eating burgers and muffins and pie, not chicken. I say they're too Abnegation." Uriah laughs again.

"Shut up, Uriah." I mock back. "Besides, there's nothing wrong with that. I mean, we now have this freedom of talking however we want about anything we want." I say, feeling that we'll soon all ease into a conversation. "It doesn't matter if the kids are Dauntless, or Abnegation, or any of the others, for that matter. They can be all of them, or none of them. That trouble is long gone." We stay silence for a while, but it's not awkward or weird. It's the kind of silence that promises thinking, and pondering.

Will squirms in Christina's arms, and she sits him down. We all watch as Will and Natalie crawl and go after each other. It's Christina that breaks the silence. "Aren't you curious?" She looks at us. "I mean, like, of where they would belong? Or if they would've turned out Divergent or not?"

"I admit I am," says Tris. "But I wouldn't want to put them through a test or anything of the sort. I wouldn't want them under any serum. Especially since they are so young."

"Even when they're older. I wouldn't want them to do the test." I say. They all turn to look at me. I look at the kids. "Unless they are willing." I don't want to admit I'm scared of what the results would tell us; what with my broken genes. "I wouldn't want to make that choice for them. I would ask them first."

"Right. You wouldn't want to push that into them. They should have a choice. A choice we never had. And either way, they can choose who they are without the necessity of the test. That would mean we're choosing for them, or limiting their choices. They should be free to choose what they want." Tris agrees with me. I nod softly at her, giving her half a smile.

"Well, if they're willing to do it at whatever age you think is good, I could set them up. There's a lot of serum left, from the old days. It's still useful. We're testing anyone who wants to be tested. Many factionless – I mean." She blushes. "Umm, many people are getting their children tested and some are Divergent. Not everyone, of course. But enough. We're healing slowly."

"Do you think Divergence is still considered dangerous?" Uriah asks.

"No, they're considered to be good." She assures him. "Some people still dress in colors, but most of us mingle. Except for the Abnegation." Christina gives us a look. "They still wear grey. And they still disappear."

"It was expected, don't you think?" Tris says, a little defensive. "They always kept to themselves. It will take a miracle if you want change now. It will take them a long time to realize times are different."

"You guys could talk to them." Uriah suggests quietly.

"Us!?" I say a little too loudly. "Why us?"

"Because you were Abnegation." Uriah says that matter-of-factly.

"Great reason, Uriah." I say, laying the sarcasm on thickly.

"Look, if anyone can lead the Abnegation to change and be part of the community we all are, it's you guys." Now he's trying to be reasonable.

"They think they'll be targeted. I think they're scared." Christina says softly.

"I think they have a right to be. Look, we ourselves say we're open minded, but we're still hanging on to our old beliefs. Imagine how everyone else is." I say a little grudgingly.

"That's true. But isn't it selfish, the way they're acting? They refuse to join us, in this change. They're being selfish by sticking to the old system." The way Tris says it, you would think she was disappointed in the Abnegation. But she has a point. They are being selfish.

"Use that." Uriah says quickly. "It could work."

"But if only a few people understand it, they will be viewed as selfish in turn. We don't want to split them up. We want them all to come. Or at least, most of them. Some people are still thinking of this city as factions. The ones who are truly happy about this are the Amity. Or, you know." Christina argues. "They've even stopped wearing their colors and they're the ones to encourage others to do the same."

"I'm actually comfortable with that. After the time in the airport, I stopped thinking colors meant anything. But I'll admit I still cling on to black. It means freedom for me." Tris says simply. I grin at her.

"It does for me too. But I find it hard to wear something other than black." I tell them. Uriah laughs.

"It's kinda funny to watch you struggle with that." He smirks. "I don't mind it. I mean, the color change."

"Me neither." Christina says.

"Before we go all political on each other, how about we eat?" Tris suggest, and we all laugh, back to the old days.

With Uriah's help, I pull out more chairs so we can all eat together at the table. "I'll get the kids." I say once we've set up. I notice I'm followed by all three of them to see how the kids do. "Hey, Will? Natalie? We've got to eat. Mama's made some food for all of us." I see them trying to climb the couch, but it's still a little too high for them. Their hands barely make it to the pillows. I hear Christina chuckle behind me, and Tris is joining her. Will turns to me and pulls on Natalie's arm.

"Papa."

"NO! Ill, up!"

"Did she just...?" Christina asks while Uriah joins Tris in laughing.

"She did." I confirm.

"Papa!" Will says again. "Papa, papa!"

"Hey, break it up, over there." Uriah jokes.

"No, no, no." I see Natalie got Tris' stubbornness when it comes to an argument.

"Papa, papa." Will doesn't give up easily either.

"Just go get them, Tobias." Tris isn't laughing anymore, she sounds a bit edgy. "Before they get hurt."

"They won't get hurt." I tell her.

"Papa!" Will says angrily. He lets go of the couch and walks towards me.

"I didn't know they could walk." Uriah's surprised.

"They learned today." I say proudly. "Come here. Be careful, now." I guide Will towards me and the dining room. In the last couple of steps he runs to me, scared he'll fall. "You were amazing." I tell him. He smiles shyly. He has Tris' smile. I kiss his forehead. "Go with Mama. I'll get Nana, okay?"

"Okay, Papa!" He grabs on to Tris' hand as they walk into the dining room.

"Nana, come on. We have to eat." I turn around, prepared with having to convince Natalie to come with me, but Christina and Uriah beat me to it. It's needless to say that Natalie loves the spotlight, something she must have gotten from our ancestors, because Tris and I are not like that. Uriah is encouraging her to walk faster while Christina holds out her arms. I see them, and if Natalie weren't my daughter, I would think she was theirs. But the blonde hair and deep blue eyes betray the scene. Both Christina and Uriah have dark complexes. Natalie takes her time to get to Christina, and she makes it look like she's been walking for a while now, even if she's just learned how to today. Once she's in Christina's arms, we all go the dining room.

Uriah asks to feed Natalie. We're about to sit Will next to us when he asks for Christina. "An Tina, papa." I grin.

"Yeah, okay. But we have to ask her first."

"Hey, Chris –" Tris is about to ask when Will puts his arms out and Christina nods as she takes him. Once everyone's got plates, we all go to different parts of the living room to eat. "Is it weird that I'm happy my kids aren't eating with me?" Tris ask shyly.

"Not at all. I mean, for one, we're eating in peace. And they're our friends. They're with family." I smile widely.

"You're right. Let's eat." Tris grins. I bite her sandwich and she chuckles. "I meant our own food."

"Of course you did."

Uriah and Christina don't want to leave until the kids are sleep, which takes quite a while. By the time they are in their cribs, it's dark outside, and Tris insists that our guests stay. They both try to say no, but knowing how stubborn Tris is, they give in at the end. We offer Christina a bed in the guest room, until Uriah tells us some amazing news.

"We've been kinda hiding something from you guys." Uriah says while he puts an arm around Christina's waist.

Tris temporarily forgets the kids are sleeping and screams with joy. "Oh, God! That's amazing! Why did you hide it from us?"

"Tris, the kids." I say in a whisper. "I'll go check on them."

"Yes, do that." Tris is Tris again, the one cheering for Christina during initiation. "Christina, I'm so happy for you." She squeals as she hugs Christina. Uriah follows me.

"Who would have thought that it would be us taking care of the children instead of them?" He tells me sarcastically.

"Yeah, who would have thought?" I mock in return. "I actually like doing this. Tris is still sentimental. According to her doctor, her past could be messing with her. Or something like that. I'm supposed to let her be."

"I can see that you are. Is it hard?"

"What?" I ask as I open the door to the kids' room.

"Putting up with the mood swings and the cravings and stuff?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Christina wants kids too." He walks over to Natalie's crib to check if she's asleep while I check Will.

"It's not hard. Well, not if you feel like you're ready. And if you also want the kids." I tell him. In a sense, I'm wrong. I wasn't ready for Natalie and Will. I did want them, but it was a surprise when we got to the doctor and he confirmed we were going to be parents. That day was possibly the greatest day of my life, because we had created life. Tris and I had done that.

"Well, I do want some too. Ever since I saw you kids. They're so adorable. But I'm not sure I would be a good father."

"You will be. You'll teach them not to be pansycakes." I chuckle. Tris' screams didn't wake up our kids. "And how to throw knives." I cover them with their blankets again – they roll around in their sleep too much – and we go back to the girls. We're laughing and Christina and Tris are sitting on the couch when we go back. Christina's candor is showing, because she's moving her hands a lot as she talks. Tris is listening with intensity.

"Well, I think you should try that." I wonder what they were talking about. "Oh, you're here." Tris smiles at me. "In which case, you guys should sleep well in the bed." She blushes a deep red. "Um, Tobias and I will be in our own room." I smirk.

"What are you thinking, Tris Prior?" She's still blushing. "I hope you're not implying anything with that sentence." Uriah and Christina get it then and start laughing. Which just makes Tris blush more. She still a bit new to the whole intimate thing, so talking about it makes her feel weird. I hug her and kiss her forehead and she hides in my shoulder. "Rest well, guys." I tell Uriah and Christina, who nod and leave to the room, chuckling.

It was Tris' idea to get a second bed in the spare room of the house in case of an emergency. I see that she was right. Not that many people visit us, but there's so many people nowadays that need hospitality. Kindness is not so easy to come for them. Christina and all the others who volunteered to help are working hard to change that, but for the time being, they wander the streets. Tris says we must provide help. It turns out I'm still working on kindness.

I wake up to a crying Tris. She's still dreaming. I shake her to wake her up, but it's not use. She's groaning, trying not to scream. I start to worry. "Tris. Tris." I say her name more urgently the second time. "Tris!" I shake her hard. She has to realize it's a nightmare. She gets these three times a week. If she's lucky. "Hey, Tris, it isn't real! Tris!" That rattles her. With a final whimper, she shudders and slowly opens her eyes.

"Oh, God, Tobias!" She kisses me intensely.

"It's okay. It's just a nightmare." I tell her softly.

"I know. I know."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

She shakes her head. "Could you...?"

"What do you want? Water?" Now she nods. I get up, and run to the kitchen. It's not even six in the morning. I don't see the sun. If it wasn't for the fact that I know my house fairly well, I would have fallen several times over. I take a pitcher and a cup. It's after she drinks that she talks.

"I was lost. And I could hear the kids crying. But I couldn't find them. There were mirrors, like a room full of mirrors. Mirrors everywhere, but it wasn't me staring back. It was Jeanine, and she was me, or I was her, I don't know. Tobias, I couldn't find them. And they kept calling for me. It was like I had turned into Jeanine, and all I could do was look into the mirror and smile while my kids were crying. I couldn't do anything. I was losing myself by turning into Jeanine."

"Hey, it was just a dream. Only a dream." She's starting to calm down. But I could imagine how my mind would scare me with a nightmare like hers. Marcus would be the one staring back at me from the mirror. I would be terrified. "Don't worry, your family – us, your family – we're here for you. And if you lose yourself, I will find you. We will find you. You don't need to worry. Your family is here, you are here. We're not going anywhere. And you are definitely not leaving us." I kiss her forehead, her cheek, her nose, her mouth. She relaxes onto me. We go back to sleep.

When we wake up much later during the day, Uriah and Christina have us beat in feeding the kids. Tris' nightmares usually drain us of energy, but I somehow manage to wake up to feed everyone. Apparently not today.

"Hey." Tris whispers.

"Morning." I grin.

"I think I'll like Uriah and Christina to come more often." I laugh, a solid sound vibrating around the room. "If it means we get to sleep in, I'm more than happy."

"But they're our kids, not theirs." I tease her.

"Are we allowed to just forget them for one second and lay here for a little longer?"

"If you want to, okay." I put my arm under Tris' head and she snuggles closer. Her fear of being close to me in the most innocent of ways is wearing off. I'm so proud of her. My other arm brings her closer. "What if I asked you that I want to have a whole day to ourselves?" I say sheepishly. I know she will probably say no, but she looks like she's in a good mood.

"I like that idea." She pauses, thinking about it. "The kids?"

"Christina and Uriah." I answer simply. She grins widely.

"Then it's settled."


	2. Beating Heart

**Once again, thank you so much to my amazing friends who keep telling me to get my shit together and post this fic; flashyfactor and BeBrave236, you guys are so amazing and awesome and supportive, I cry. You guys are my rock through this right now and I'm so glad I approached you both on being my *beta* readers. I cannot thank you enough for all the love you guys are giving me right now. As for the guest person who review yesterday, I want to hug you and thank you as well for taking the time to review. Also to the two people who already follow/faved/put on alert, you have my eternal gratitude. I forgot to mention last time that I OWN NONE OF THESE CHARACTERS OKAY? Veronica Roth does. Okay, enjoy (or not) chapter 2. AH, AND IF YOU HAPPEN TO COME UP WITH A BETTER NAME FOR THE FIC, DONT BOTHER (SORRY IF I SOUND RUDE) BC IVE DECIDE TO KEEP THIS FAB TITLE. Stay rad little sunshines xoxo**

"Leave instructions and clothes and things for them to play with. Uriah and Christina are going to do the rest."

"Wait. You're serious?"

"I am. You need this, Tris, I can feel it. We haven't really been resting well these past couple of months."

"Well, you do run at any chance to go see the kids. You hover over them too much, I think they need space."

"Well, I think I'm great." I chuckle with that comment. Tris is smiling too. "This is a double win situation. Think about it. We rest and Christina and Uriah learn more about how to take care of kids. It's perfect."

"You know what?" Tris asks me, pausing for emphasis. "You're right. We deserve this. I just want to stay in bed longer, but I really want to eat."

"You know I pamper you too much as well, right?" I tell her, making her laugh and blush with happiness. "I'll go get you breakfast and talk to Uriah and Christina about our day and their day with the kids." I get up, and put on a shirt over my pajamas. "Don't go anywhere." I say innocently.

"I promise I won't." She uses the same tone I did. This woman sure knows me.

Outside, it looks like a storm has recently passed by. A big mess of something is all over the kitchen. I'm not sure what it's supposed to be, but hopefully, I won't be the one to clean it up. I will not let anything spoil my day with Tris. It's funny how we didn't plan any of it. Things just happened. I stick a finger into the mixture and taste. It's sweet, but weirdly delicious at the same time; I'm still trying to puzzle it out when Christina comes in with Natalie.

"Oh, we're sorry about the mess, Four." She's holding my daughter like an expert. Natalie's too busy with Christina's hair. She hasn't noticed me yet.

"Careful, she loves to pull on your hair." I whisper.

"You're too late on delivering the information. I've already learned that, and the hard way." I chuckle. "Anyways, Uriah said we could do muffins, and he told me what to mix and everything. Then the kids wanted to help and this happened."

That's a nice thought. Fresh muffins. "Wait, Uriah knows how to make muffins?"

"Don't act so surprised." Uriah says, coming into the kitchen with Will on his shoulders. "I don't always burn houses. I've got a trick or two up my sleeve."

"I can see that." I say sarcastically. "Hey, guys, listen, I'm gonna ask you two a favor." I say a little nervously. I can see that the kids are having fun, but this will be the first time we do something like this. Tris and I have never had anyone to leave the kids with – I wouldn't trust my parents with the task, or so much as call them and tell them they have grandchildren – so of course I'm nervous. Plus, I'm not sure how the kids will react themselves. We haven't left them alone. I mean, I know they won't be alone, but they'll be without us. "Tris needs a break, and I wanted to ask you if you could look after the kids for us? You know, for a while?"

Christina's smile is big for her face. "Of course. These little angels are easy to take care of. I'm more than happy to do it."

"Me too." Uriah says, tickling Will's bare feet. "There's just one problem."

I frown. "What's that?"

"Why don't the kids call me Uncle Uriah?"

Exactly an hour later, Tris and I are on the go. I'm afraid the children will cry, and that thought almost makes me cry. Uriah takes them to the kitchen to check on the muffins, and Christina is practically kicking us out of our own house to avoid any last minute second thoughts. We didn't say goodbye to the kids. Tris takes my arm and we head down the small steps away from our home. Now that we're out, I'm not sure where to go. I don't know where we could go take a picnic when Tris suggest something wild; something Dauntless.

"I want to go to the top of the zip lining building." She says without a moment's hesitation. "And before you say anything about it being too high, we're only going to be there. We're not going to zip line or anything. I promise. I just want to go there for memories."

I swallow my fear. "Of course." We make for the building, and our house isn't that far from it. We're there in less than an hour. "How do we get up? There's nobody around to turn the electricity on for us."

"We don't need to ask. At least, not anymore." Tris says confidently. I wonder why she's confident right now. "Come on. Or are you a pansycake?" She's my Tris again. Dauntless Tris; the one that took a challenge to prove who she was and enjoyed it. The one who could brave anything. She was always there, but now, she's dominant. It feels like we're back to being teenagers again. She's sixteen and I'm eighteen and we're what we always were – Dauntless. Even though I am afraid of heights, I'm starting to get excited about getting to the top of the building. The elevator works fine, and we rush to the top floor in no time. I'm gripping the picnic basket with all my strength. A strange mixture of joy and fear swirl around in my stomach – I didn't really like heights, but being here with Tris is worth it. She pulls on my hand and we have to climb the little ladder. It's not the old one from the last time I was here. It turns out someone replaces it when they can afford it. The ladder still wiggles too much. I hold the ladder for Tris and then she takes the basket before I climb. Once I'm up, the wind is nice here. It's not cold, but Tris brought several blankets. The view is beautiful. I try to ignore the nudging fear that's telling me to look away. "Look, Tobias!" I turn. "It's the house! I bet I can see the kids from here." Tris is giggling.

"Yeah, look. I see Will is eating some muffins for us." I tease. "You want to eat?"

She grins. "Oh, yeah. I'm starving."

I pull out some of the sandwiches we didn't get to eat yesterday and hand her one. She has already set the blanket down, and we sit together as we watch Chicago go to sleep. We did leave early from the house and now, we watch from above as the train whistles and the inhabitants of this city start to go home. My mother is down there somewhere. The city empties quickly. Construction workers and volunteers are the most abundant. Some people go check on some others laying on the street before heading home. The construction workers wrap up their work. It'll be my turn in a day or two. Tris helps with the homeless people. We don't call them factionless anymore. Well, we try not to.

It's amazing how the city managed to get back up after such a short amount of time. We know what truly happened, but the way people talk about it, Jeanine died and we won and everyone is free to do what they please. In a way, that is correct. But I also know that most of them were not immune to the memory serum because they are not Divergent. And so, many of them talk, but they have no idea what they're talking about. It's sad to watch. They're like little children blinking at the sun and insisting on looking at it even though they are told they shouldn't. Some things are familiar, but some things are new and they're scared.

After we finish eating and drinking, we lay down and plan on taking a nap. I start to laugh to myself when I remember Tris and me wanting to go on a date while we were trying to figure out what Jeanine was hiding from all of us. We were on the top of another building, and we were talking about how war limited your dating possibilities. I know I feel in love with her more then. Even with everything going on around us, she was thinking about me. Of a future with me. I'm still laughing when she props herself on one elbow and looks at me like I'm from the moon.

"What's so funny?"

"Remembering our dates."

"Were we that horrible?"

"No. But war did limit our dating possibilities." I grin, using her own words.

"It sure did, didn't it?" She's grinning too. Then she gasps. "Oh! You remember?"

"Of course I do. I was scared of falling off."

"Of course." She tells me sarcastically. "This place does bring memories, but not in the way you would expect them, huh?"

"You're right about that." I motion for her to lay her head on my chest. When she does, I wrap my arms around her. We lay silent – comfortable – but silent. Memories swirl around in my brain, temporarily making me forget all the bad things and just revel in the happy ones. Maybe if we would've grown up somewhere else, we would be different. But it doesn't matter. Because I grew up in the same place as her. I grew up in the same place as Beatrice Prior; and that couldn't make me happier. And it may have taken a while to find her, but I did, in the end. What would I do without her? If I would been given the choice to grow up anywhere I wanted, with a family of my choosing, and a place of my own to call home, I would choose her. Because that's what she means to me. She means home, happiness, love. She means so much, and I feel like I don't tell her enough, or that there aren't enough words for me to tell her that. She's my foundation. Without her, I am the lost boy who was scared of being in the same room as his father. I am the boy that cries as the walls close in on him for being punished in the closet. The boy who lost his mother and remembering her was a rebellion in itself. The boy who did everything he could to escape his father and in doing so, chose a cruel faction that could have been his undoing. She makes me better. I love her so much for making me better.

I'm deep in these thoughts when Tris' voice pulls me back. "You have that look in your eyes. The one you get when you're deep in thought. It's like you're in another world."

I laugh. "Sometimes I am. What is it?"

"You think I have something to say because I interrupted your thoughts?"

"I don't think. I know."

"Hm." She smiles. "You're right. I was remembering when I told you I was pregnant."

"Oh, I remember that day. I cried so much, we both though I was going to dry up."

"You did." She punches me lightly in the arm. I forget how young we are sometimes, what with taking care of the kids and all. I'm twenty-five, and Tris twenty-three. The kids make me feel old. It's kind of different to flirt like this now. We're not teenagers anymore, but we're not exactly mature adults. Not really. "It's the reason why you don't cry anymore. You're dried up." We both laugh at that statement. It's true that I don't cry much. But it's not because I'm dried up; I'm just not the crying type. "Anyway, I remember how every night, you would always listen to the kids in there. You got more excited over the course of my nine months. Then you started babbling about how 'I could have sworn I heard more than one heart in there' and me telling you that 'of course you can hear two hearts because one is mine and one is the baby's'. You insisted every week that we go to the doctor's but when we did visit, he always messed up and said we were going to have one. You were right, Tobias. We had twins."

"I should be a doctor, not that guy."

"You should. You're great at that listening thing. It calmed both me and the kids down. You talking to us, and listening to us."

"Well, that listening thing was my favorite thing. I loved hearing your beating heart along with the kids' hearts. It was a little song all by itself. Sometimes, it was the only thing that would put me to sleep. I would have to constantly remind myself that I couldn't fall asleep on your belly because I was too heavy."

"You did fall asleep on them once. But I did too. We woke up the same way we had fallen asleep. And that was the first time the kids started to kick in there. I woke up being kicked."

"I was scared because I could see them moving under your skin and I thought they were trapped in there, trying to get out. It was both amazing and terrifying. I panicked and almost called a doctor."

"Tobias." She starts slowly. "I want to ask you something."

"Ask away."

"What if I wanted more kids?" She sounds so nervous, her voice shakes at the end.

"I..." I'm speechless for a moment, her words bouncing around in my mind, not clear at first, but getting there. "Tris, are you sure? I mean, we can barely handle Will and Natalie." Her face falls. "Now, wait just a minute. I didn't say no. I'm saying that maybe we should wait until the kids are a little older in order to have more kids. I don't want to be fighting over who has to change who's dippers." That makes her smile. "I miss those nights, you know. The ones with the beating heart. It was quiet and peaceful and full of strong beats. Can I call it that? The 'Beating Heart Nights'?"

"That's cheesy, Four."

"I specialize in being cheesy." I kiss her forehead. I sit up, bringing Tris with me. "Now it's my turn to ask for something."

"Okay."

"I know this is the worst place. And the worst way because according to Matthew, I'm supposed to be using a ring along with it." Tris looks confused.

"Matthew?"

"Yes, I've been talking with Matthew. That's not the point. Listen. Um. I need you to stand up." I notice the picnic basket has a loose straw. I pull on it and make a quick ring. Tris is already standing, not sure of what's going on. I get up too, and my legs are shaking. This fear is different. It's not the consuming kind, like my fear of heights. This is the type of fear that makes you nervous and twitchy, the sort of temporary ones. I struggle to clear my throat. "Mmh. Um. Beatrice Prior." I mentally slap myself. These nerves make things so complicated. I start again, but this time, I just blur out my question. I do it before I change my mind and not ask her. This picnic has been long overdue, and this proposal as well. Matthew is right, I should have asked her a while ago. I'm gonna have to be brave. "Beatrice Prior, would you please marry me?" I'm down on one knee – did Matthew say one or both? – cupping the ring in my hands.

She's no longer confused, and she's crying again. Tears of joy? She only nods and I take her hand, looking for the finger to put the ring on. Matthew said the one next to the little finger. Not the thumb, but the little one. I fit the ring in and Tris laughs. I'm still on one knee so she leans down to kiss me. Tears of joy. She's crying tears of joy. "I love you, Tobias."

"I love you too." I smile. She is mine. My Tris.

"What now? Did we just get married?"

"No, I only proposed. We can get married tomorrow, or in a week, or a year. Just choose when and we'll get married." I tell her, unable to contain a big smile.

"You've been giving this a lot of thought. How long have you been talking to Matthew for?"

"Quite a while, actually. We're surprised you haven't noticed. Uriah said I should have bet on it, but I told him no."

"Uriah knew about this?"

"Yeah, he did. He's probably gossiping with Christina about it now." I joke.

"He probably is. Speaking of Christina and Uriah..."

"Time to leave?"

"Time to leave. We have kids to look after."

"I know. Are you cold?"

"A little." I hand her the blanket. "Alright, let's go."

We return after dark. We decided to take the long way, as Tris wanted to see the Ferris Wheel. I'm not sure how we're going to use it now, but Evelyn and Johanna decided to keep it up, for some reason. We open the door, laughing and holding hands. As we do, we see Will and Natalie are still up, and Uriah is trying to teach them to climb the couch. He's even demonstrating. It just makes us laugh more. Christina sticks her head out of the kitchen to look whose home and comes over to us. "We didn't burn the house!"

"We can see that." Tris teases. "Good job, Uriah!" She goes over to the kids.

"Thanks, Christina." I smile at her.

"It was not problem, like I told you." She walks to the kitchen and I follow her. It's spotless. How she managed to clean Uriah's mess is beyond me. I feel kind of guilty that I let her clean up that mess. I can also smell something. It's not chicken. I wonder what they cooked. "We had a lot of fun with the kids. Uriah and I, we wanted to ask you something. If we could burrow the kids, for a bit longer. I know you and Tris just got back and that you must be tired. How about you have another few days without the kids? You know, just you and Tris in this house?"

"I don't know. I don't mind. But we'll have to ask Tris." I go to the living room, where Tris is just about to get up from the couch and head to the kitchen. "Do you want something, Tris?"

"No, I don't need anything. But Uriah asked me something about the kids."

I laugh. "Christina asked me something about the kids too. What do you say? I said yeah."

"I said yes too."

"In that case, let's get the kids' things. They're gonna need a lot of dippers and some bottles, lots of clothes, little shoes and socks. Is it cold? It's cold. They'll need some sweaters and blankets. Do they eat cereal? What do they eat? What's their favorite food? Do I need to learn how to cook something?" Christina is already counting what she'll need.

"Hey, Christina?" Tris goes to her and stops her from pacing around. "Relax. I'll go get their stuff, okay?"

"Yes," Christina allows, and Tris goes to the room to get our children's stuff. "What do they like, Four?"

"Don't do that." I tell her, teasing. "You can't spoil them."

"And you don't?" She mocks back.

"Uh, well, I'm their father, so there's a difference." I say, chuckling as I speak. That's when I notice Will and Natalie are walking to me, their arms out.

"Papa!" Natalie says while Will just shows me those big, blue eyes of his. He got those from his mother. I can't resist them.

"Come here, then." They run to me, giggling. I pick both of them up, easy.

"Showoff." I hear Uriah grunt.

"What?" I ask. "They're heavy?"

"No, they just like you carrying them." Uriah sounds betrayed.

I turn to the kids. "Natalie and Will." I say sternly. "Where you mean to Uncle Uriah?" Will shakes his head with Natalie smiles and nods. "Guys, you're supposed to be nice. We went over this."

"Papa, Nana pull." Will starts to chatter. Then he goes on to say a lot of gibberish that even I can't make sense of.

"Did you pull on your uncle's hair, Natalie?" I ask her, trying to sound angry at her, which doesn't work.

"No. Ill." She tells me when I look at her.

"No." Will says back. They start to get into an argument of who pulled hair and who didn't. I set them down to split them up.

"Did they pull your hair?" I ask Uriah, who just shrugs.

"You weren't supposed to find out about that." Christina tells me. "It didn't even hurt him. He was laughing. He's just sad the kids ran up to you right now." She turns to Uriah. "It's natural for them, Uriah. He's their father. He's more familiar than you."

"I know, I'm just messing with you guys." Uriah's usually cheerful voice is back.

"I'll still tell the kids not to be rude." I say, pretending to be mad.

"Oh, come on, Four. They're just kids. They don't know any better." Christina sounds concerned.

"Well, they have to learn." This is a joke between Tris and me. I pretend to be angry with the kids while they crawl around. With them walking, they'll probably run now, and go to Tris and she'll know what's up. It's funny to see Christina's serious expression and Uriah's frown because they're in the dark. I make up a lot of games for my kids. I want them to laugh. I turn to Will. "Why were you a bad baby, huh, Will?" He's smiling, because he knows what's coming.

"Papa!" He says with joy, and he begins to run. Now Uriah and Christina are puzzled.

"It's a game. I'll never hit my kids." I tell them, and they look relieved. I'll never be Marcus. "Come here, Will! Don't you hide behind your mama, I'm gonna get you!" I chase him, and Natalie chases me.

"Hey, wait up!" Uriah screams, trying to get into the game.

Will almost bumps onto his mother while going down the hall. Looks like Tris is done with packing up, and she flattens herself against the wall to make room for us. She shakes her head while laughing and goes to Christina. Will notices too late that Tris just went back. He stops abruptly and then tries to dodge me but I scope him up quickly. I hear Natalie laughing behind me, which means Uriah's got her. We go the living room and I sit on the floor with Will. "This is what you get for being a bad baby." I say while I tickle him. Then I put his tummy on my knees and pretend to hit him on his butt as I keep tickling him. His laughter is loud and full of many things. Like a strong wind and the roaring water at the bottom of the chasm. "Hey, Uriah, pass me Natalie." I do the same thing to her, and Tris and Christina end up having to change both of their dippers before they go. We made them laugh too much.

While the girls change the kids' dippers, Uriah asks me everything about the kids. Their favorite toy, game, and food. I tell him as much as I can, because I don't know what their favorite thing is. They're too young to know that yet. I just know they like to be chased around and they love to hear Tris read. They mostly eat cereal, but other foods are good for them too, just in small bite-sized portions.

"Are you scared of taking care of my kids?" I tease him and make him blush. I thought Uriah wasn't the blushing type. He takes a while to answer, as if he were thinking that my question were a test he needs to pass in order to win my approval and get the kids for the weekend. This is not the Uriah I know, and it's amazing to watch how he can goof around and still be mature enough to want to be a father. He's one of a kind. I know that.

He finally breathes out an answer. "Yeah. I am. What if they get hurt under my care? Or sick?"

"Uriah?" He looks different. He's anxious. He looks like one of the only times he ever looked sad or sacred, or like a little boy – when he heard about Marlene. I pat his cheek. "You're gonna be great." That gets him smiling. "I know you'll be fine. And think of this as practice, yeah?"

He laughs. "Yeah. Thanks, man. And Tris too. It's a big thing, to trust us with your kids."

"I know they're in good hands. They're with family." I give him a big smile and clap him in the back. "And if anything happens to them, like, if they fall or get hurt on their own? That's just life. They're going to have to go through that. They'll be fine. If they get sick, call us. And we'll all go to the hospital and have the kids get checked up."

"You sound awfully calm about this." He's starts his teasing again.

"Well, I admit it'll be weird to sleep through the night with no cries or anything of the sort but I know they'll be okay. I'm just going to wish you and Christina good luck for the night." I say sarcastically while Uriah laughs.

"They're ready." Tris announces while she hands Uriah a backpack and tells him it has Will's things while I notice Christina has another, which must be for Natalie. "Hey, Will? Natalie? Come say bye to you mama. Can you do that?" Tris is going to cry again. Both Will and Natalie go to Tris and kiss her.

"Bye, Mama." Will says, a little confused. He doesn't know what he's saying but he's repeating it because Tris said it. Natalie says it too.

They come to me, because Tris pushed them a little in my direction. She doesn't want the kids to see her cry. "Listen to me, okay? You're going with Aunt Christina and Uncle Uriah for a few days, okay? Have fun and be good. Or else, when you come home, I'm gonna be angry at you." I explain to them. Will smiles and nods. They both kiss me and go to Christina and Uriah. Will gets carried by Christina while Natalie is on Uriah's shoulders.

"Bye, Papa." Will says as he's carried out the door. He's less confused, but he looks at Christina, who tells him, and shows him, to wave. He does. I wave goodbye. I know the kids will have fun, and Tris and I need this well-deserved break. The door is closed and the house is quiet now.

"Tris?" I turn to her. She's not crying but she doesn't look too happy either.

"I regret saying yes." She sounds solemn.

"Oh, no, don't say that." I go to her and put my arms around her. "You know you deserve this, right? The kids need space from us and we need space from them. It'll be good for both of us and for Uriah and Christina and for the kids too." I think something horrible and decide not the say it. I try not to, but I tense up, hesitating.

Tris notices my hesitation. "What? What is it?"

"Well, I was thinking something but it's not worth saying out loud." I still hesitate. Now I've drops my arms from around her. I can't look at her while saying this.

"Tell me, Tobias." She sounds anxious, as if she knew what I was thinking. Knowing that she knows me too well, I must tell her. She makes me look at her.

"I was also thinking that this will be good for the kids because if they get used to others taking care of them, it would mean that if something were to happen to us, the kids will be alright." I say slowly, looking down at the end.

"You're right." She says, sadness clear in her voice.

"But enough sad thoughts. Hey, Prior, we have a quiet night. What shall we do with it?" I try to cheer her up.

"I don't know." At first, she doesn't get it. When she blushes, I know she's finally got it. "Oh, um." She tries to speak but her shyness is too much.

"Okay." I say. I put my arms around her a second time and wait.

She can't resist. She's the first one to move. She's kissing me fiercely, as if she can't have enough of it. I don't blame her. I can never have enough of her either. I carry her, and she tangles her fingers on my curls, pulling at them exactly like our daughter. I smile as she pauses for air. "I love you." She whispers, her warm breath tickling my neck. She kisses me there.

"I love you too." I stop walking long enough to kiss her near her collarbone. Where the ravens are; the tattoos that are her memories, both happy and sad. Then I walk to the room, her still cradled in my arms. Her legs are crossed, something that amuses me. We're in our room now, and I set her gently on our bed. "I take back what I said." I know this will make her laugh, even if she'll be confused at first.

"Take back what?" Her eyebrows come together, and I think I phrased myself wrong. I'll just have to go with it now.

"I won't need cake to go to your funeral. I won't need cake to go anywhere with you. I'm perfectly fine with following you everywhere with or without cake." I say, and I smile as I see her reaction. "But I still stand by something else I said. You're not beautiful." I pause, smiling. "You're imperfect. And that's more beautiful than what I bargained for."

"Tobias." She says, her voice soft. "Come here."

I grin and go kiss her. We start slow, just kissing each other at first. But I can't keep off my mind what she told me on top of the building. When she said she wanted more kids. If we make more kids now... You know what? Yeah. I want more kids. And I want them now.

The kissing goes on to a different level when she starts tugging at my shirt. And I start tugging at hers. We're both shirtless and I stop kissing her mouth and start to make my way down. First her chin and her neck, then on to her collarbone and where her heart is. I kiss her stomach last, and she laughs, my kisses tickling her. She whispers my name, a whisper so soft, it could be the wind. She sits up, and kisses me, then moves on to sitting on my lap as she kisses me. We fall back into the bed, laughing, enjoying this moment. I take her hips, and there it is, that electric current that always ran between us. It just always seems to be there, whenever we touch.

Her hands are shaking. She was always so afraid. Just like last time, I don't push anything. I let her do everything, at her own pace, and her own comfortableness. She shivers with my touch, and I smile as she snuggles closer. "Tobias..." She tells me with a shaking voice. "You lead. It's... It's your turn."

"Hey, no, Tris." I can see her struggling to look like she's fine. She's not fooling me. "I know you don't want this. Its fine, I'm fine. You do your thing, okay. We enjoyed last time, I'm sure we'll enjoy this as well." The moment vanishes for a while, and I feel silly, laying here, next to her, naked. She moves on top of me, and I think she'll start when again she controls her facial expressions when looking at me.

"What it I want you to?" It still feels like she's forcing her words out, but I can see the determination in her eyes. Is she serious?

It returns. The moment returns. But I still hesitate. "Really?"

A shaky breath before the answer. "Yeah." In which case...


	3. Fight For You

**Okay, once again, much love and appreciation for my beautiful friends, flashyfactor and BeBrave236 for taking time away from their schoolwork and other important awesome stuff (like voting for Tris) to read my little story. Also, to all of you who have visited, thank you. To the ones who reviewed, also a huge thank you. It's nice to know that somewhere out there, someone likes my story. Please, please, please review, I love to read them. Oh, yeah, also friendly reminder that I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THESE CHARACTERS, they're all Veronica Roth. I can't believe I'm actually considering on updating daily. If that happens... well, you'll find out. Here's chapter 3! (Sorry it's short, I had writer's block. Also so sorry for updating so late ugh.)**

Before I actually take the lead, I remember something.

_*Flashback*_

_I'm in the Dauntless compound, and I'm going to show her my fears. I've been meaning to tell her who I am. That I am Tobias, the defect boy that transferred to Dauntless from Abnegation. But I can't bring myself to say it out loud. I do manage to get her attention while I make my way to the fear landscape room. Her hands shake when she feeds me the serum with the syringe, but I don't even flinch. As we're about to go through my fears, I make an attempt to tell her who I am._

_"See if you can figure out why they call me Four," I say, hoping to get her curious. It works._

_"What's your real name?" She asks._

_I smile, but she can't see me. The room is dark because I've closed the door. I do feel her hand on mine; we're gripping each other tightly. "See if you can figure that out too."_

_The city suddenly surrounds us, giving away my first fear; heights. A strong wind comes, and I do everything to not yelp. I wrap my arm around Tris, doing my best to remain in control. I'm breathing out of my mouth quickly after._

_"We have to jump off, right?" She screams over the wind. I can only nod. "On three, okay?" I nod again. If I speak, I could puke. "One..." Oh no. "Two..." Breathe. "Three!" She pulls me along, and it's not easy. I let her guide me, because doing this alone would be even more complicated. The ground is coming at me quickly, and I'm not sure if I scream or if it's in my head. Since Tris says nothing, I can only assume it's in my mind._

_We're now on the ground, having actually never left, and I know what's coming next, but I need to catch my breath. I put my hand on my chest. Tris turns to look at me, a crazy grin on her face. "What's next?"_

_"It's –" but I'm cut off by the closing walls. Tris is shoved onto me. I put my arms in, no longer able to fit. The ceiling and walls come at me fast, pushing me from all sides._

_"Confinement." She tells me quickly. I groan, trying to fit, knowing that the walls will just keep closing. I feel Tris' eyes on me, but it's hard to see in the dark._

_"Hey," she tells me. "It's okay. Here –" She moves my arm and although there isn't that much space, I find I'm able to move a bit. I feel her breath brush my face as I'm sure she feels mine. I grip her back tightly, though I'm still short of space. Tris doesn't take up much, which is a relief, but I feel her small frame pressed on me. "This is the first time I'm happy I'm so small." She laughs. We're in the same line of thoughts then._

_"Mmh." I manage._

_"We can't break out of here," she begins to think of a way out, for my sake, I guess. I don't stop her. "It's easier to face the fear head on, right?" How about no. "So what you need to do is make the space smaller." Nope, nope, nope. "Make it worse so it gets better. Right?"_

_There might be another way, but I just let her take control. "Yes." I sound tense._

_"Okay. We have to crouch, then. Ready?"_

_No, definitely no. I'm not ready. She starts to move. She pulls me down, then curls into a ball against my chest. The noise around me tells me the walls are eating up the space. We're tangled, but I don't have time to think about it, none at all. The closing walls are the only thing to occupy my mind. "Ah..." I rasp out. "This is worse. This is definitely..." I'm full on panicking now, and she's so calm, so cool._

_"Shh, arms around me." She demands. I obey, slipping my arms around her. This presents a small distraction. Her small but warm body feels solid compared to my state of mind. "The simulation measures your fear response," she tells me, reminding me of my own advice to her and the other transfers. "So if you can calm your heartbeat down, it will move on to the next one. Remember?" She plows through her sentence, not letting me respond. "So try to forget that we're here."_

_"Yeah?" I whisper shakily into her ear. "That easy, huh?"_

_"You know, most boys would enjoy being trapped in close quarters with a girl." She says sarcastically._

_"Not claustrophobic people, Tris!" I say, incredulous._

_"Okay, okay." She takes my hand and places it over her heart. Rapid palpitations thunder under my hand, her beats are so strong. "Feel my heartbeat. Can you feel it?"_

_Obviously. "Yes."_

_"Feel how steady it is?"_

_Actually, no, not really. "It's fast."_

_"Yes, well, that has nothing to do with the box." She winces. That makes me smile. "Every time I breathe, you breathe. Focus on that."_

_"Okay."_

_*Flashback over*_

I hover above her, and smile, trying to ease her. She looks up at me, her bright blue eyes holding my own, steady, determined. I place my hand a little over her breast. Her heartbeat intensifies, and I feel my smile widen. "Hey, Tris." I know that what I say will make her laugh, or at least get her to lose a bit of her nerves. "It's fast. Why is your heart racing, Tris?

"Oh, um."

"We're not in a box, you know."

"We'll, if we were in a box, you wouldn't be this relaxed." She bites back. But she starts laughing, remembering. I laugh along with her. We're so close and her heartbeat slows down a little.

"You're right." A small silence comes, but it's not weird or awkward. It's also not comfortable. Before the silence can get any bigger, I finally decide to go for it. "You know, most girls would enjoy being in this situation with her boyfriend." I smirk. Her giggles are making the whole bed shake, and I can't help it either. I suddenly turn serious. "Are you sure?" We never touch or do anything unless absolutely necessary. For one, Tris doesn't do well with physical touch – well, she's coping. And the other; we're not careless with our touches, or at least, that's how Tris describes it. It's always so electrifying. She nods, setting her jaw. "Really sure?"

"Yes," she breathes out softly. "I am."

I'm not rough, but I think I go too fast because she winces a little. "Ow."

"You okay? Tris?"

"Yeah, yeah." Her laugh is shaky, but I calculate my moves more. She grips my arm tightly, and moves to accommodate herself. "Oh." She's biting her lip now.

"Tris?"

"You slowed down." She sounds a bit accusatory, and I don't know what to make of that. "But I like it better like that." She blushes a dark red, and I bite back a smile. "Could you go like this the whole time? I mean, if you're okay with it?" She looks away, somehow embarrassed. I don't respond, waiting for her to look at me. It takes her a while, but eventually, she does.

"Of course. Whatever you want." I say the words as soon as she's holding my gaze and smiles shyly. "Tell me what to do."

"Um, okay." I start again, making sure I'm going at her pace. She starts to squirm, and she soon bucks her hips up to mine. I think the move is both involuntary but on purpose. She's blushing again, and I cup my hand under her chin and turn her to look at me.

"You want me to go faster?" I ask slowly. She nods quickly, but barely. For a moment, I think it's my imagination, but her hips buck again, more confident this time, and I know she's starting to get comfortable. I pick up the pace slightly, and now she presses her entire body up to mine. Her head is the only thing on the bed, using the pillow. I shift my weight to my left arm, and use the right one to pull her up to me. She wraps her legs around my hips and a moan tumbles from her lips. I hesitate, but when I look at her eyes, they're glossy. Her pupils are dilated, the blue is less present. Another moan escapes and I know she's enjoying this now.

"Tobias." She tells me happily. Her nose is touching my chest. I set her on the bed and now I'm fully on top of her. Her legs get loose around my hips and now she's clutching my back. I kiss her ravens again. "A bit faster." She whispers in my ear, her whisper raspy and lusty.

"Yes," I breathe out, and when I do, she can't stop saying my name. Her grip on my back turns painful when I realize she's digging her nails. I'll be marked for sure. I moan as well and look down at her tenderly. "I love you, Tris." I tell her before kissing her lips. Her hands are tugging my hair again, still kissing me. She bites my lower lip before letting me go. Her thumb brushes my lip and I smile under it.

"I love you too." Her voice sounds quiet and loud at the same time. I can't describe it. I realize we've picked up the pace and we stop talking for a bit. Instead, we moan and groan together, goading each other to keep going. We're not only making noises, though. Tris calls my name, and I do the same. I never let her look away now, and I'm sure my eyes are like hers, glossy and with dilated pupils.

It's like we're in a daze, and we can't come off of it. We're too onto it, but it's not a bad thing. We reach our high together, and she squeals as I give a final moan. I settle down next to her and kiss her hard one more time. When I pull away, her lips are bright and full of color. She does that cute thing she always does when we kiss; she brushes her thumb across my lips.

Her eyelids begin to droop, and I know what's coming next. If she falls asleep, I will too. "I love you, Tobias." She tells me sleepily.

"I love you too." I say, kissing her forehead. She snuggles closer, resting a small hand and her head on my chest.

"If the nightmares come, don't wake me."

"What?" I slip out of sleep's grip, completely focused on what she's just said. "No way, Tris."

"I want to learn how to control them." She tells me, still sleepy and oblivious to how I just reacted. "You won't always be here to comfort me. Because you could be with the kids, or at work. I have to learn to deal with it on my own." She presses her tiny frame on me, feeling awfully confident. I still worry, of course. But then I remember something. She doesn't need me to protect her. I learned that in Dauntless. She can do this on her own.

"Fine. But in case you need me, I'll fight for you tonight; every night if necessary." Another memory comes to mind. "Sleep. I'll fight the bad dreams off if they come to get you."

Her sleepy voice bubbles with confusion. "With what?"

"My bare hands, obviously." That gets her to chuckle softly. And just like that, she's asleep. Her steady breathing tells me so. I pull a blanket on us, finally letting sleep regain its grip on me.

It takes me going back to work for the kids to come back. Christina and Uriah took them longer than planned. Both Tris and I managed to be calm the first couple of days without them. The last two days were a nightmare. We wouldn't eat or sleep due to the absence of the laughter and cries of our children.

I come home, tired from a day of building and repairing, hoping to hear from Christina or Uriah. When I hear the kids' laughter, I assume I'm hallucinating, maybe because I've finally lost my mind due to all the worry. Tris pokes her head out from the kitchen and smiles at me. That's enough to tell me that what I'm hearing is real. I'm no longer exhausted when I rush to the kitchen and see them on their eating chairs. An unknown sound escapes my mouth as I pick them up and kiss them repeatedly. Christina and Uriah stop their conversation with Tris when they see my reaction.

Tears spill from my eyes, and both Will and Natalie laugh, tugging my hair, unaware of all the worry and relief I have for them. The squeals of delight tell me my kids are happy to see me too, and that's enough to throw me into another crying fit.

I see the water in Tris' eyes. Even her voice trembles when she speaks to me. "Ah. And I thought you were dried up," her chuckle is weak, quickly crumbling as she cries.

Christina and Uriah are slow to react, and I feel terrible once they do. Christina drags Tris to the living room and soothes her with soft words. I can't tell what they're talking about, but Tris only shakes her head softly. Uriah deals with me.

"Hey, man," he says slowly. "We didn't know you were gonna be like this." He sounds worried now, and I know it's not his fault or Christina's. They did it to give us space. And I'm grateful for that. But Tris and I had no idea we depended so much on the kids. I know for sure that they enjoyed being away, because they were taken care of. I know it affected us more than it did them. Uriah takes Natalie and I keep my son.

"It's okay," I say, my voice brittle. I clear my throat. "Seriously." It sounds better, but Uriah is still apologizing with his body language. I quickly wipe the tears away. "I'm good." I say firmly this time, and Uriah starts to look relieved. "We just didn't think we'd miss the kids so much. Thanks for everything, man."

"It was awesome. You should have seen them," Uriah starts once he sees he's in the clear. He goes on about how the kids helped him learn new things he didn't know about himself. I see Natalie pulling his ear. I'm about to stop her when I see her looking at his tattoo. She lets go of his ear and does it again. I tilt my head sideways, confused as to what she's doing. Uriah even stops talking once he sees I'm no longer paying attention. "What's wrong?"

"Don't move." I whisper.

"Is there something on me? Like a bug, or something?"

I purse my lips to avoid laughing at him. "No. It's just Natalie." I see Will has settled onto my arms and is now sleeping. Am I imagining it or does he feel heavier? I put that thought aside as I quickly put Will in his crib and then run to get the camera.

"Tobias?" Tris mumbles, having just calmed down herself.

I put a finger to my lips and motion for her and Christina to come. They look at each other, confused, but follow me nonetheless. I turn the camera on and sneak into the kitchen where Uriah is exactly as I left him. Natalie doesn't hear us because she's still playing with Uriah's ear. I record her, and Tris stifles a laugh by putting her fist in her mouth. Christina looks like she's about to cry because she can't get her laughter out. She leaves and we hear her burst into laughter in the living room. The sudden noise makes Natalie look up. When she sees us, she looks like she got caught doing something she wasn't supposed to. At this point, we can't help but start laughing. The only ones not doing so are Uriah and Natalie.

"What the hell, Four?" He yells loudly.

"You should so see yourself." Tris chuckles, finally regaining her breath from her burst of laughter. Christina is still laughing outside.

"Hey, language, kid," I say, struggling to sound stern among my laughter. I stop recording and get ready to replay the video. "I'm not having the kids picking up those words." I'm standing next to him now, and Natalie asks for Tris. Uriah hands her over with a frown and peeks over my shoulder.

"Here, just watch it." I hand him the camera and go help Tris with putting Natalie to sleep. Christina is hauling bags to the kitchen. I see Tris and she points at Christina. I don't even question it. I know Uriah's seen the whole video when he starts laughing loudly. Christina and I have just finished taking all the bags and are beginning to unload.

"I can't believe I didn't even notice her." Uriah chuckles as he overlooks me and Christina putting away the food from the bags. "She was super sneaky." He smiles. His eyes light up, as if he just realized something. "She got it from you!"

"What do you mean?" I say, not really following his line of thought.

"She's sneaky like you. You made like, zero noise when you went to record me." He's right. When I hear Tris laughing behind me at Uriah's comment, I know Natalie is asleep.

"Should we eat?" Tris and I ask Uriah and Christina at the same time. After that, the rest of the day and night go fairly well. We haven't had peace like this in some time, and Tris and I enjoy time in our room.

Exhausted from a long day of work and activities, I finally lay down in bed and sleep.

Its Tris' turn to wake me up. Well, from my nightmare. I can't recall the dream once I'm awake, but I know it scared me senseless because I'm groping around in the darkness until I find her. "Four! Four!" Tris yells into the quiet of the night, pulling me away from the darkness of my mind. "Wake up!" I open my eyes, knowing that if she keeps yelling, she could wake up the kids.

"I'm okay, I'm okay," I say, breathless.

"Want to talk?"

"You'll probably think I'm lying, but I honestly can't remember what it was. All I know is that I was scared. Maybe it had to do with my fears or something."

"Well, in any case... It was only a dream." She tells me vaguely.

"I know. You're tired. Sorry for waking you up. Let's go back to sleep." I mumble.

She only nods, settling in my arms. The rest of the night is uneventful.

In the next week alone, we get more rest than intended, and I'm glad we do. The kids' birthday is coming up soon. Although Tris doesn't want to celebrate because it would only be the four of us, I insist until she says yes. A part of me tells me she won't get used to the idea of doing some things Abnegation never did. We're still fighting our old selves. We'll eventually win, because we keep tackling our ideology whenever we do something we always wanted to try, or when we do something we know is different from what we're used to, so we keep on going.

Since Tris doesn't think a party is a good idea, I begin to invite people. Even though it's a few months away, I have to get people to make some time to celebrate with the kids. Uriah and his family are up for it in an instant and offer to bring lots of cake. Christina squeals with delight when I tell her about the party as I bump into her outside the Hub. She insists on decorating.

One evening, I'm replying to Matthew's email. I hesitate before telling him about the party, and that he's welcomed. And to tell Amar and Tori's brother, George, to swing by as well. Then I tell him that if he comes and gets weird, I'm kicking him out. And also to get me a ring for Tris because she's still wearing the straw one from the picnic and I haven't been able to find a decent one.

I can't think of anyone else to invite. I don't even consider my parents. They're just a huge 'no' in my mind. Then it comes to me. Caleb. Is Tris going to be okay with that? But if I invite her brother, will she ask me to invite Marcus and Evelyn? For the first question, I'm not sure. She's had her difficulties with him, but being her parents' daughter, she loves Caleb no matter what. I'll invite him, and it's his choice if he shows up or not. About the second question, I know for a fact she doesn't like Marcus but is a bit unsure about Evelyn. After our time with the factionless during the war with the Erudite, she got wary of her. I don't blame her for having trust issues – I, for one, also have them – but we know she's not Marcus. Then again, she left me for two years... Alone with that monster. Better not, then. It'll only be Caleb. And again, it's his choice to come over or not. I'm secretly hoping he doesn't, but I won't tell Tris that.

Come to think of it, I'm starting to get highly excited for this birthday celebration. When I was in Abnegation and my mother was still with us, she would sneak me a muffin on my birthday. Of course, it was selfish and greedy, but I always appreciated the gesture. If I was smart, the muffin would last me four days. And sometimes, I wouldn't eat it at all. I would give it away to a factionless.

I can tell Tris doesn't want to show it, but the gleam in her eyes hasn't gone unnoticed by me. I know she's just as excited, if not even more, than I am about this celebration. The kids notice our change, and they pick it up as well. They try to bug me and ask what's made us so excited and happy but I refuse to tell them.

"Surprise." I tell them the month leading up to their party.

Natalie's eyebrows come together, clearly confused. Will speaks up. "Surprise?" The word sounds funny in his mouth and I bite back a laugh.

"Surprise," I confirm.

Matthew replies back that night, and I make a huge deal out of avoiding Tris in order to answer it.

"Tell Matthew I said hello," Tris tells me pointedly.

"About time." I mock back. She's standing behind me, relaxing after a long day with the kids, resting her elbows on my shoulders. After a couple of seconds, I can tell she's digging them in on purpose, but I won't let her win. Trying to make her change back to her humor from an hour ago, I start to talk about the party while typing back a reply. "I started inviting people."

"Oh, good. How long ago?"

"Three months."

"Four." She groans. "And you tell me this now?"

"Um..."

"I bet you only invited your friends."

"See now, that's just mean. I invited some of your friends too. Including Caleb."

"Lying won't save you, Tobias."

"Oh, come on!" I say indignantly. "I may not get along with him, but I swear I did. And also Matthew and Cara. I told Matthew to pass the message to Zoe as well, but he said she was too busy to come."

"You really did invite him then?"

"Oh, dear God. Your lack of faith in me is rude. I'm feeling highly offended right now."

She laughs, a rich sound I never want to forget. It sounds like a promise from life that my future is bright and beautiful. As long as I hear that sound every day, I'm good. "Okay, who else did you get?"

"The usual. Uriah, Zeke, Shauna, Christina. And the others I told you about. Oh, and Amar with Tori's brother."

"Won't Zeke invite more people than we bargained for?"

"I told Uriah to control him and he said he will. Uriah knows what he's doing."

"And Tori's brother?"

"What about him?"

"Do you think he'll be alright?"

"Amar, through Matthew's mail, told me that if we're his friends, George is willing to give us a shot. And in the end, he knows he can't blame us for what happened with Tori."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"Your," she clears her throat uncomfortably. "Um, parents?"

"Oh, that won't be a problem. They're not invited." I brush off the question easily.

"If the Pedrads knows about the party, surely more people will. This is why I didn't want a party, Four. Your parents will find out and while I have some comfortableness with Evelyn, I will not let Marcus set foot inside this house."

"They won't," I say. "I'm not comfortable with the idea of them getting anywhere near Will or Natalie. And I assure you they won't come near our kids, because they won't know about this party."

"Fine, but if something happens..."

"Relax. It won't. If Marcus shows up, I'll fight him to get him out. And if Evelyn comes, we'll deal with it however you want."

"Okay." She hesitates. "Hurry up with your letter. I'll wait for you in the room." She trails her fingers down my spine as she leaves, leaving a beautiful trail of goosebumps along my back.


	4. Hanging On

**You all definitely have a right to sue me, hate me, send me angry messages/comments, and kill me. I literally left you all hanging for a whole _MONTH_! That's just cruel. Although I had no wifi for that whole time, that's still not an excuse to not upload. I could have written something else, like a one shot or something of that sort. I'm sorry this chapter is trashy, but I wanted to make Four cook so I did :D. Thank you so much to everyone who has visited my story, I've almost made it to a thousand. Please, please, please, I'm begging you on my knees to review or PM me to criticize my work. I really need your advice! Also, a huge, lovely shout out to my *beta* readers this time around, my wonderful girls from Spain; TartadeTobias and YouDoYouDVGT because you helped me so much even though English is not your first language. You girls keep staying fabulous, like always. Friendly reminder that I don't own these characters, Veronica Roth does. If anything, I'm just burrowing them :D. Here's chapter Tobias, I hope you like it, and I will forever apologize to everyone that I left hanging with my one month absence. Stay golden, my little nuggets oxox **

In the month it takes to prepare for the kids' birthday party, a lot of things happen. The only thing left for us to do besides clean up the house for the preparation of the party is providing the food. Everyone else has told us they'll bring everything else. On the day both Tris and I get a break, we go with the kids to buy some food from the Amity. The ex-Amity? From the farms.

Tris loads us with lots of fruit and vegetables for snacks and to secretly to find out what the kids' favorite fruits and vegetables are. Then we head over the where the Erudite used to be and find processed meats and other foods at a building. We're about to get chicken when Uriah happens to be buying food as well and stops us from 'making the biggest mistake of your lives' by taking us to the Candor sector and helping us find fresh meat. Yes, we do end up buying chicken, but he insists on taking beef and pork too.

At home, Tris is at a loss with what to do with all the beef and pork. I remember seeing the Dauntless use ham and bacon to make sandwiches and on some fun nights, pasta and cold soups. As for the beef, I'm a hundred percent sure Uriah will slaughter us with mockery if we use it to make burgers. Maybe I could make it into a lasagna? Or warm soup.

"We're going to need pasta, Tris!" I say from the kitchen as I unload our shopping.

"I thought that wasn't real." She comes up behind me.

"It is. The Dauntless were obsessed with spaghetti and meatballs."

"What the heck are those?"

"You don't remember eating pasta?"

"No."

"Didn't we eat it with the Candor?"

"I don't think so."

"Oh, yeah, we didn't. Okay, fine." I huff. "But see, the Dauntless are not only in love with chocolate. They're also in love with ketchup. And that comes from tomatoes. Once they figured that out, pasta came into the menu. It was only served on special occasions, though. It's delicious, I promise."

"I don't know."

"What if I made you some?"

"You cook?"

"Yeah," I laugh. "What about the mornings?"

"Oh, breakfast doesn't count, sweetie."

"Sweetie?" I ask, perplexed.

"Never mind. Forget I mentioned it. Go get your pasta, then."

"I will." I say, challenging her. "And I know you're gonna like it." I arch my eyebrow, inviting her to contradict me. She's about to make a remark when Will comes up to her.

"Sleepy Will," he tugs at her hand. "Mama, sleepy."

"Yes, okay." Its noon, but the kids got tired at the market. They had too much fun looking at colorful candies and picking some to bring home. They filled the whole cart with marshmallows but Tris put her foot down and allowed one bag. As she picks Will up, her eyes tell me our discussion isn't over. I chuckle as I shrug my jacket on and take the keys.

"I'll be back soon!" I yell to make sure Tris hears me head out. I then notice Natalie pushing a chair until she's right under the coat rack. "What are you doing, Nana?"

"Go out." She tells me with a voice that suggests she's being obvious. "You." She then gives me an innocent look that makes me laugh. She wants to go with me.

"Tobias, have you seen Natalie?" I hear Tris' worried voice float out of the twins' room.

"I have an idea of where she might be." I smile and that gets Natalie to giggle.

"Is she laughing? Oh, God, where is she? If she's..." Tris sighs with relief after she comes running out of the room and spots Natalie near me. "Wait, what is she doing?"

"She's getting her coat. She wants to come with me." I say immediately.

"And if she falls asleep on you?"

"I have two arms, so I'm pretty sure I'll be able to carry her and some small bags with pasta." I reply. "She'll be okay." I go over to the chair and help Natalie grab her tiny coat by carrying her. "See? Doing it already."

"Don't mock me, Four."

"We'll be back quickly. Love you."

"I love you too."

"Bye, mama." Natalie says while waving. They picked it up fairly well after Christina taught them.

"You guys take care, alright?"

"Okay. Daddy run, Nana okay."

That makes Tris smile and we leave while she closes the door behind us. I set Natalie down at her request and hold her hand while she walks. She's much too tiny for me, therefore, I end up stooping in order for her to not stretch her arm too much. We both get tired halfway to the market and she ends up on my shoulders.

I get spaghetti, lasagna and elbow pasta from the farms. I'm about to buy bread when I remember Johanna's warning from my time with the Amity. I'm not risking it. I'm on my way to pay when I feel someone's stare and turn around to see who it is. It takes me a while, but finally, I spot him hiding near the fruit section.

"What are you doing here, Caleb?" I feel Natalie tug on my curls excitedly when she sees where we're going. By someone's stupid decision, they put the fruits right next to the candy. If Tris sees another bag of marshmallows, she could end up killing me.

"Food shopping." He holds a lonely bag of cereal in his hands.

"Ha." I laugh sarcastically. "Okay."

"I'm serious."

"What are you really doing here?" I says menacingly. For some reason, he laughs. That's when I realize that no matter how menacing I could sound to anyone at this moment, they won't take me seriously due to the adorable baby in the colorful clothes sitting on my shoulders. I shift my pasta bags on one hand and get Natalie to transfer to my arm. "Caleb?"

"Who's this adorable baby?" He avoids my question and gasps when he sees her clearly. She's a mix of both Tris and I, with my eyes and whatnot. But she's mostly like the Priors. Her dimples when she smiles are alike her namesake, Natalie Prior. Her blonde hair and small frame speak for themselves. "What's her name?" he asks in a hushed tone. I don't want to answer but tears brim his eyes. I see him staring at Natalie and she's smiling at him. I can imagine her with dark hair and suddenly... She's not Natalie Eaton, but Natalie Prior.

"Her name's..." And I can't get the word out. I'm in Tris' shoes now, and I can see why she gets so chocked up with our kids. They're a constant reminder of her losses. "Natalie." I choke out, the word raspy as it leaves me.

"You didn't." Caleb trembles. He looks at me angrily, but I won't accept his reaction. It was because of his old faction that his parents are dead. Tris doesn't blame him, at least not anymore, but I know I do. It's because of him that she went through so much. He can't pretend to be so chocked up and emotional when he caused her all that pain.

"Tris did. And we couldn't be happier to have chosen her name." I reply, my voice stone hard again. I'll suffer for Tris' pain, not his. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm leaving."

"Am I still invited?"

"Of course. At Tris' request."

"Right. Tell her I can't go."

"Tell her yourself. If the words are coming from me, she'll think I'm lying to her about inviting you. She thinks I didn't do it."

"I'll give her a call then." He says quickly. I start to doubt him.

"Do it now."

"I can't."

"You're going to lie to her about me, aren't you?" I say furiously. At the same time, I feel my arms tighten around my daughter.

"I won't. But I can't believe she named her after our mother." He pauses for a second. He smiles at Natalie, who hides at the crock of my neck after flashing a second smile. "Actually, I can." He changes his mind. "I'm sorry I can't go." With that, he turns around and pays. I don't move until he's out of sight.

"Well, I'm not," I say under my breath. I get back in line and let Natalie give the lady our money.

"And who's this precious beauty?" The lady asks.

"Oh, um, Natalie." I say, causing Natalie to laugh when she hears her name.

"She's beautiful." The lady tells me. Her body language implies she was Amity. "Your parents must be proud of her."

That makes me laugh. "Oh, no," I say as I compose myself again. "She's not my sister. Nana," I ask her who I am by pointing at myself.

"Papa." Natalie croons, making the lady gasp. Natalie tugs at my ears and squeals.

"But you're so young."

"Yes, well, she's two, so." I say sarcastically. The lady laughs.

"Well, you have a good night now, young man," she tells me with a smile. "Go with happiness."

That makes me smile. Of course. "Thanks ma'am. You too." We head out of the market and I know Natalie's falling asleep on me when she grips my ears tightly and rests her chin on my head. I hurry home, because if she falls asleep on me with my full arms, she could fall and seriously get hurt. And I won't hear the end of 'I told you so' from Tris. I try to get her to talk to me the whole time, but with each passing second she replies less and less. I stop a couple of blocks from home to slip her onto my arms. She snuggles quickly and I'm forced to walk quickly but softly in order to get her home soon without waking her up. I end up knocking on the door with my foot and the look and Tris' face goes from sleepy to mocking. I know won't stop mocking me when she gets the chance to start but I run as smoothly as possible and set Natalie down on her crib quickly. Tris trails behind me, waiting for her opening. She attacks when I get to the pantry and begin to put away the things.

"I told you she was going to fall asleep on you." She tells me with a smirk.

"Then you should have made a bet on it," I tell her sarcastically. "And I should have make a bet on how you would also falls asleep."

"Oh, you're gonna make this about me!" She laughs, making me laugh as well. "But you're right. I'm so tired."

"Go rest then," I say, nudging her towards our room with my shoulder. "I'll cook and you nap. I'll wake you up when it's ready."

"Are you sure?" Her voice slurs. I purse my lips and hold back a smile. I can only nod. Relief washes over her yes before answering. "Okay. But wake me up soon. I don't want to sleep too much."

She makes her way out of the kitchen and I follow to make sure she doesn't fall. Once she shuts the door, I go back to the kitchen and begin to work. I'm about to attack the tomatoes when I recall the last time I did the laundry and Tris and the kids got crazy with the juice. I put an apron on and start cooking. The pasta is done quickly, and the crushed tomatoes are coming to a boil in the pot when Tris stumbles into the kitchen with Natalie and both of their heads are a rat's nest.

"Something smells good." Tris' sleepy voice tells me with a smile. "Is that what they call pasta?" I pretend to not hear her and only look over my shoulder with a sly smile. I halfway done with making the meatballs. "Wait, what are you wearing?" I feel my neck and ears turn red and I know I'm blushing hard. "Is that an apron?" She laughs loudly, and I still pretend to be too concentrated to notice. Then she sighs. "Actually, that's thoughtful of you." She shuffles her feet and I finally turn around. "It's my turn to wash the clothes."

"Of course I'm thoughtful," I say while smiling softly. "Who do you take me for?" I wiggle my eyebrows. She laughs. "It smells good because _I_ cooked it."

"Ha! Yeah, okay," she tells me while patting Natalie's back.

"Really." I take the gloves I used to make the meatballs with off. "Is she asleep again?" To which Tris only nods. "Well, put her down. They'll eat later, when they wake up."

She nods again but hesitates before leaving. "I can't believe it smells this good." Then she runs to the kids' room to put Natalie back in her crib. When she comes back and spots the meatballs still out, she looks at me, perplexed. "Are those supposed to be raw?"

I laugh. "No," I say while putting new gloves on. "I had to make sure the pasta was ready before putting this in." I grab the meatballs carefully and throw them in with the bubbling tomatoes. "I have to go drain the pasta now." I throw in the last of the meatballs and carry the second pot with the pasta to the sink. The pot is not as hot as before due to me turning off the stove before the pasta was fully cooked. Tris goes to the table and sits. I feel her eyes follow my every move, and my ears start to redden again. "Do you have to look at me while I do this?" I ask, fully conscious of what she's doing. I turn in time to see her hide a smile.

"I find you fascinating when you do things like this. How does such a tall, bulky man fit in here?" She tells me with a blush. I smirk and keep doing my work.

Roughly thirty minutes later, I present one steaming plate of pasta in front of Tris. She grabs her fork eagerly and waits for me to get my plate. "What are you waiting for?" I mock. "Eat," I chuckle. "I didn't poison it or anything."

"I'm waiting for you." She tells me. Right on time, the kids chose to wake up, and I quickly untie the knot behind my back and rush to their room. I hear Tris groan behind me; possibly because I threw the apron on the floor to run here. I scoop both of my children in my arms and return before she's even up from her chair. "Seriously?"

"What?"

"How did you possibly beat me to the kids?"

"Is that what's bothering you?"

"Four," she groans again.

"Just take Will, I'll take Natalie." I say before she can say anything else. "Let's just eat." I tell her, smiling, not looking up. I feel her looking again and I shy away. Most of the time, I'm perfectly comfortable with her looking at me while I smile or laugh. And sometimes I'm back to my eighteen year old self and I shy away. Who would bother to look at me? Especially when I smile? She bothers.

I strap Natalie in and place some spaghetti on her plate. I notice Tris push her plate aside and begin to feed Will. "You're going to let it go cold?" She ignores me. "Tris?" I sigh. "Talk to me, please. I'm not eating with us angry, okay?" We both stop feeding the kids, which in itself is pointless because they can already eat by themselves now.

"I want you to give me a chance too, Tobias," she tells me, blinking away tears. "I want to be able to care for my children as well, you know?" She stops to take a shaky breath. "I want to do it without you constantly over me, and without constantly afraid I'll have a break down."

"Yes," I tell her, holding back a smile. I gave her time and she pulled through like I knew she would.

"You gave me time, and I'm so thankful, really," she gives me a flimsy smile and I loosen my lips to smile with her. "But I think I took enough time off. I'm good now."

"I knew you could. And if you would have needed even more time, I would have given it to you." I tell her while looking at her dead in the eye.

"Thank you," she whispers softly.

"But there's one thing I can't promise," I say slyly.

"What?" I've confused her.

"I don't think I can back off the kids." To which she laughs.

Tris enjoyed pasta night so much, it ends up being my turn to cook for the remaining time before the kids' party. In a way, this is good, because I get to surprise Tris with all the different meals I saw in Dauntless. And from Zeke and Uriah's mother. Tris also gets to choose some of her favorite meals for the party. It also ends up being a bad thing, but I don't admit it to Tris. I don't know how I find the energy to cook after coming from work, but it leaves me drained at night. So much that I don't even have nightmares. Maybe my heavy sleep is rubbing off on Tris because we both start to sleep well.

One week before the kids' birthday, on a Wednesday, I think, I make us some soup. Again, I use spaghetti for it, and meat. But I add them when the broth had simmered. It also had carrots and celery, which was something I decided to add because the only healthy thing the Dauntless knew were tomatoes. The kids ended up eating two servings, they liked it so much. Tris smiles while she tells me that she thinks carrots are their favorite.

On Thursday, I make sandwiches with fried bacon and ham. The melting cheese makes Natalie and Will giggle. It ends with them trying to see how long they can stretch it for without the cheese breaking. That results in Tris and I finding cheese in their hair, clothes and shoes when we get them ready for bed. We laugh when we see they managed to get some cheese on us too.

Its macaroni and cheese on Friday. We're not saved from what the kids do with it. The pasta is soft and the cheese makes the meal gooey. I can tell Tris didn't like this one as much, but she tells me nothing about it. This time around, we end up cleaning cheese from under the kids' eating chairs, their toys, and under our fingernails. Feeding them without a fork or spoon was a huge mistake.

To mock Tris back for not having Abnegation food in a while, I cook a similar meal on Saturday. Carrots, mashed potatoes, bread, a scoop of rice. Instead of boiled chicken, though, I give her fried pork chops. She grins upon seeing a familiar meal; until she sees the pork chops.

"And I thought I was getting a normal meal today," she tells me with sarcasm.

"You're not the one cooking, ma'am. So for now, you can only enjoy the cook's best meals." I mock back.

"I've been meaning to ask." She pauses a little. I turn to see where she's looking and I choke while trying not to laugh. Tris and I forgot to cut the meat into small, bite size pieces for the kids. So now, they each have a big piece of meat in their hands and are pulling hard with their little teeth in an attempt to eat it. They're even shaking their heads from the effort, hoping to be able to bite.

I clear my throat aggressively and gulp some water down. I quickly pry the meat from Will's mouth while Tris does the same with Natalie. "No, hang on," I try to get him to loosen up. "Will, I have to cut the meat, so you can eat it." He frowns when I take it away and looks like he's about to cry, so I hurry with the task at hand. Once they're able to eat again, we go back to our conversation. "Tris? You were asking?"

"Oh, yes. Right," she eyes the kids, but they can eat on their own now. "Where did you learn? To cook?"

"Ah," I sigh. "I learned a thing or two from Evelyn," I chew slowly. "With my mom." There's a small, awkward pause. "But most of it, I did in Dauntless. But in particular, Zeke's mother. I always ended up helping her whenever I went over, because you know, that's what we did in Abnegation." She nods while smiling, encouraging me to keep talking. "She liked my help but told me to change my ways if I wanted to be truly Dauntless. It didn't stop me from helping, but I did my best to follow her advice. She always invited me over after my initiation. She was an excellent cook, which is why I think Uriah learned how to bake. To impress her, I'm sure of it." I say in the end with a laugh.

"That's great!" Her smile is radiant. "And she taught you well then."

"Oh, she didn't teach me." I blush slightly. "All I did was observe."

"And you remember?"

I roll my eyes. "Of course I do."

"Either way, all these meals have been great. I wonder what you'll do tomorrow," she tells me, her eyes bright and eager. I've impressed her. "Let's finish and go to bed."

When we're done, I surprise her again. "Go with the kids, I'll do the dishes."

"But you cooked," she tells me, slightly upset. "I can't let you do everything."

"You're not. You're gonna put the kids to bed." I say as I pile the dishes and go to the sink.

Her eyes light up. "Okay," she walks out with Will and Natalie in tow.

It doesn't take too long to wash the dishes, but the second I'm done and I'm drying my hands, Tris is calling me for help. I really have taken it upon myself to care for the kids at night. I have an idea of what they might want.

"Tobias!" She calls for me again.

I stand at the door of the kids' room and watch. Will is waddling around the room and Tris is trying to tuck Natalie as she kicks her blanket around. It's a mad house. Tris looks like she's ready to call for me as she turns towards the door.

"Don't just stand there, crossing your arms!" She tells me, her face bright red. "Help me!" The look in her eyes is wild. Like she's been through something bad.

"They can smell your insecurity. Just calm down; relax." I tell her, doing my best to not smile. I look at the floor in order to not look at her face and burst out laughing. I clear my throat before speaking. "You have to not be forceful on them. Give them an air of tiredness. If they feel it come off of you, they'll sleep as well." I look up, feeling the corner of my mouth lifting. I call to Natalie. "Nana." She tries to runs to me, and I go and pick her up quickly from her crib. She tries to engage me in a game, but I yawn widely and she giggles before yawning herself.

Tris is staring, as if she wants to pick up a few tips and I smile before turning away. I pat Natalie's back, rubbing occasionally. I pace the room slowly and soothingly. Her mutters begin to soften, telling me she's drifting off to sleep. Will is in Tris' arms already, and she's vaguely trailing me, on the other side of the room. The twins end up falling asleep at the same time, which makes me chuckle lightly.

"I am exhausted." Tris groans once we're in our room. "I feel like every limb is about to fall off."

"Alike the beginning of Dauntless initiation?" I smirk.

"Oh," Tris says while she gets her stuff to the bathroom. She keeps going once she's back. "Come to think of it, yeah." She looks at me before taking her pillow and fluffing it. "That really worked, you know?"

"Oh?" I say now, making her smile.

"Is that how you always sleep them?"

"Ah," I say as I shrug out of my shirt. I'm left in my jeans. "Well, not really." I tug the jeans off while sitting on the bed. Tris fluffs the pillow faster. "Most of the time it is that way." I pull my shorts on and head over to my side of the bed. "On some nights, I tell them stories."

"Stories? How so?" Tris asks as we settle under the sheets.

"Just stuff from my life, I guess." I say, turning to look at her.

"Like what happened to you?" She looks at me, shocked. "I don't think that's appropriate for them!" She half-whispers half-yells.

I smile, which almost gets her to yell more then I hold both of her wrists with my hands, locking them as if they were handcuffs. "I don't tell them everything. And I tell them," I try to find the appropriate word. "Tales, if you will." I still try to find words to explain what I do. "I don't give them details, and they like hearing them. They think of the stories as legends or myths or stuff of long ago." I explain. It's not that I'm trying to not get in trouble with Tris, but I'm finding it hard to explain.

"I want to hear them," she says under her breath.

"Of course." I lay on my side, and she lays on hers. We hold each other's gaze, and I can't stop drinking in her eyes; I always thought they were beautiful. "You're invited to listen any time you want."

"You didn't tell me about this?"

"It doesn't happen that often. Only once a month."

"And that's not often?" She tells me, sounding offended. "Once a month isn't often? God."

"I just didn't think it would interest you."

"I think it will. When's the next one?"

"You're in luck. It's tomorrow." I smile then peck her forehead. She tugs my arm and softly lays her head on it before drifting off to sleep.

I wake up to Tris humming softly. I don't recognize it, but it sounds happy. "Hey," she tells me as she snuggles closer.

I look at her and smile. "Hey." I wrap my other arm around her. "Had a good night?"

"Surprisingly, yes." A wide smile accompanies that comment, and I kiss her forehead alike last night. She wraps her legs around my own, tangling them all up. "You?"

"I slept like a baby," I grin like an idiot. "Say, we're up early. What gives?"

"I don't know. Maybe because we all slept well through the night. The kids fuss less now. We're sleeping too well."

"Can you believe their birthday celebration is in three days?" I ask, excitement seeping into my voice. "When's your birthday?" My excitement dissipates, and I'm serious now. I know my birthday, but I don't think I know hers, even after all these years.. And if hers is near, then I have to do something for her as well.

"I don't think it matters. You know how the Abnegation were. If it didn't matter then, why would it matter now?"

"It matters to me. Who cares about everyone else?" I feel my eyebrows coming together, in confusion, I guess. "Besides, that's in the past. You know that if we want to move on, we need to let go of it all. There isn't a faction system anymore." I try to make her see.

"Oh, I know." She pauses slightly. "But it's hard." She pauses again. "But if you want to know when I was born, you must tell me when you were born first."

"Now that's cheating." I groan. "I asked first."

"But as the lady, I get the pick." She grins widely.

"That's not very Dauntless," I mock. Then I groan again. "You're the worst."

"That's why you love me," she's shaking, and I can tell she's doing her best to not burst out in laughter.

"True." I remember what happened in Amity; when they gave her too much peace serum and she was way too happy. "You told me in Amity. When we were hiding."

"Ah," she blushes deeply.

I'm back to teasing. "If we were still in Dauntless, you would have to answer the question first or you'll end up facing a fear." I challenge her by lifting an eyebrow. "Are you a pansycake?"

"Shut up, Four." She tells me, groaning herself. "Fine." She huffs.

"I'm joking," I tell her as I poke her nose. She swats my hand away. "I was born in October."

"Which day?" She interrupts me, curious.

"On the twentieth." I answer patiently. "Okay, your turn."

"April twenty five."

"Your birthday passed?"

"Yes," she tells me in a whisper, vaguely audible. "It did."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I ask her sadly. I know I'm giving her the look, the one I do when I'm sad or upset. She says I look like a sad puppy when I do it.

"Don't," she sounds sad herself. "Tobias, please don't give me that look."

"But you should have told me. I would have wanted to have done something for you. It's been years since the factions have been gone. I should be doing something special for you. Times are different. You're allowed to indulge."

"Maybe I don't want to indulge yet." She mumbles.

"Well, you should." I can tell by the sunlight that it's close to eight. I sneak a look at the clock and see I'm right. "Would you be okay with a late present?"

"What do you mean?" The moment she finishes asking, I plan a big kiss on her lips. She laughs and then kisses me back.

"Happy late birthday, Tris Prior."

"Happy late birthday to me." She says shyly with a smile.

Putting the kids to bed this night is a show. Tris expects me to provide something unusual, but I do what I always do. I tell the kids of my time in Dauntless as if it were the experience of someone else. I always begin slowly, because they love hearing me talk. They pick up a lot of words from both Tris and I.

"There was a boy, a long time ago. His dad wasn't very nice to him, you know. His mom wasn't there anymore. So the boy wanted to go to a new place, a different place." I begin. I'm in the rocking chair, gently lulling the kids to sleep. Tris is sitting on the floor, a blanket wrapped around herself and a pillow under her elbows. She's staring at me intensely. "A big day came. A huge ceremony. And on that day, he left." I stop rocking for emphasis and the kids look up at me. I look at each out of the corner of my eye.

"Go," Will tells me excitedly while Natalie nods.

"A test, a look at his mind told him he had to stay, but he didn't want to be with his father anymore. He went to a different group, and in that group, he learned to be strong. First, he was told to run and jump on a train. Then he jumped off the train and onto the top of a building."

"That's high, kids." Tris interrupts. "Higher then when you're on your father's shoulders." I smile and the kids look at each other as if they already know. They nod and go back to snuggling on the crock of my neck.

"Then he had to jump of the building." I grin. "And even though the boy was afraid of being so high up, he jumped because he wanted to be different. He wanted to be free." Will and Natalie are curling up, and all their little fusses, from playing with their hands and my hair, begin to become less frequent. "Even when he was the last one to jump, he still did it, because he was brave." I lower my voice. "He did his best to belong in the new group, and he succeeded. He did his best, and he came out stronger and a fighter, ready to protect everybody. Like a hero." Tris quickly wipes her tears when she sees me looking her way. Her smile is flimsy. "Everyone made fun of the boy, for being from a different group. But that didn't stop him. In fact, he was so good, he won all the games and he was the first out of them all." I brag. At this point, I'm sure the kids are deeply asleep. "I'll tell you next time." I wait for groans or a fuss, but when I don't hear anything, I know they're asleep.

"How did you do it? How did you hang on?" Tris asks me softly when we're lying in bed. We put the kids down early, and we lay there talking for a while, hoping to sleep amid our chatter.

"I don't know." I start, slightly distracted. The way I tell the kids the stuff that happened to me is soft compared to what really did. My initiation was destructive. I learned things about myself, dangerous things. And the brutality of it all; I know Tris got it hard, but the other initiates I was up against were something else. I still remember Eric. And I had to fight to be taken seriously. Not only physically, but mentally as well. The reputation I got was thanks to Amar. "All I knew was that I wanted to change my past by becoming something else."

"And did it?" She asks me all serious, looking at me dead in the eyes, ready to soak up the answer the minute I say it.

"Of course not," I say, my voice opaque. "But I did become different, though it was hard." I exhale. "You know how initiation began, so I'll save you from that."

"Were you really the last one?"

"The last one?" I start, confused. But the second I finish asking what she's talking about, I know. Jumping off the building and onto the net.

"The last jumper." She says sheepishly.

"Yes, I was." I say, smiling. "I think I was also a screamer, though I'm not sure."

"I wasn't," she recalls. "But Christina was. I need to bug her about it." Tris is laughing loudly. It's solid, strong, free. "You know my initiation. You even guided me through it. But I don't know yours."

"Ah, well," I start. "You know the beginning, so I'll save you from that." A smile adorns her face. "But after we jumped off, Amar told us that the leaders of Dauntless wanted to try something new that year, and we went straight to the fear landscape. I was also the last one there." I smile, expecting to see one in return, but Tris averts her eyes and looks at my lips instead. "Eric was first." That gets her attention. "He was so good, he even scared the Dauntless born."

"Really?" She ask, incredulous.

"Yes," I huff. "We all saw right off that he was dangerous.

"He was brutal, I'll give him that." She says, her voice heavy with remembrance. "But even though he tried, he wasn't able to knock you off the top." She lifts an eyebrow. "Is that what made him the way he was when I initiated?"

"It did influence." She makes a sound, then waves her hands for me to continue. "He did this thing, with his breathing, and he would relax and even though he had twelve fears, he burned through them because of the way he would calm his heart rate with his breathing." I pause. "When I went through my fear landscape for the first time," I stop myself, feeling sixteen again. I remember it so well. A look at Tris tells me she's attentive, and slightly sad about what's to come. I jam my teeth together, feeling my jawline tighten. This stops a scream from erupting, and I must let it out or I could explode. A single touch from Tris is all it takes to calm me down, to remind me that times are different and I am no longer sixteen, and I'm not just beginning my life at Dauntless. I take an extremely shaking breathe and keep going. "When I experienced it all for the first time, I didn't know what to expect except for my fear of heights and Marcus. I knew, even then, that I was afraid and feeble thanks to all the pain he's inflicted upon me." I can't look at her, not anymore. She never looked at me, and still hasn't for that matter, with pity when she found out about Marcus. But I still find myself unable to meet her eyes.

Now we are different. It took time, but we've changed. We are less cruel and more kind and open and free and caring and so many other things. Tris has become more sensible, something I didn't know was in her until a couple of years after the incident at the airport. When we were in Dauntless, many things made her cruel, but now, things make her soft, and it's hard to describe the beauty of it. I'm sure I've changed as well, but I don't know to which extend. I'm still struggling with some new aspects of myself, like being kind, and honest – I'm sure Tris struggles with her own things as well – but I think manage, as I'm sure Tris does as well. I still find it hard to believe that after all we went through, we're still alive and we have a home, a life, children, and each other. I'm getting cheesy again. I keep it to myself as I continue.

"As I'm sure you remember, I always got Marcus last." I look at her from the corner of my eye and I notice for the first time that she's making unintelligible shapes across my chest with her fingers, doing her best to not look interested. Her tense shoulders tell me otherwise. "I forget who, or maybe I overheard, someone say that your last fear is your worst fear, because it's the deepest one, the one that's rooted at the deep part of your brain." I pause again, now hearing Amar's words. I hesitate before telling her. "After crying thanks to my last fear, I managed to overcome it and break through the whole thing. Amar was impressed, because I only had four. Then he told me that he understood why I didn't want to say my name. He took me to dinner and in front of everyone told Tori that I only had four fears and that I had broken a record." I smile, now focusing on the ceiling. I feel Tris stop, and the soothing traces her fingers left now burn on my skin. "Everyone looked at me different, and Eric tried to threaten everyone by telling them my name and then Four was born." I say dramatically. A small chuckle follows that.

"Did Eric know your name?" She asks, her voice clogged with doubt.

"In the beginning, I'm sure he didn't. You know that feeling we got as we were choosing? Those nerves?" She lifts her head and nods. "Everyone is too busy, or nervous, or focused on their choice. I'm sure he was bluffing in the beginning. But he must have done some digging around, because when I fought him, all he had to do was say Eaton for me to explode and beat him up." I say brusquely.

"Oh," Tris squeaks.

Even when telling her, I don't want to go much into detail about how terrifying my initiation was. Unlike her, who was given the choice to fit into Dauntless because of her divergence, I didn't know if I was gonna fit in. The first few days, I spent the mornings in the fear landscape and the afternoons in the training room. I'm not saying Tris didn't go through a lot to triumph during her initiation, but I could see that she wanted her life at Dauntless. I didn't. I didn't want it, I didn't want to become Marcus, driven by rage and violence. I wanted to escape it all. I became Dauntless under my terms, and mine alone. Tris did the same, but she slowly embraced what was around her. It took Amar's advice for me to realize that I didn't want to be a cold, hard Dauntless. I took Dauntless and gave it my own definition. I hung on due to my desire to be different than my father, to be brave while – somehow – still following a few rules I was drilled with in Abnegation.

"Anyway," I exhale slowly. "I think we should sleep. We have big days ahead of us and we have to rest."

"But you didn't finish," she whines a little.

"I will, but it has to be some other day." I look at her, and she tries to pout. "I swear I will."

A nod, a yawn, and snuggles later, we're both deeply asleep.


	5. I Won't Let You Go

**Aloha! So it seems it's almost been another month. I didn't get the help of any friends this time around because everyone's busy with schoolwork and I didn't want to bother anyone. But if any of you would like to help me out for the next chapter, I would gladly appreciate the help :)! I figured making all of you wait another month is mental. Please forgive the spelling mistakes :)! I still love my lovely friends who have helped me in the past, specially Joey and Solana, because they were the ones to encourage me to upload this little fic of mine and they have continuously cheered me on :). Love you lots, Taco Doge squad! Also, I know that, canon-ly speaking, Tris' birthday was supposed to be in the fall/winter months, but I used the publishing date of Divergent for her birthday, because, technically... she was born when the book was published (excuse the cheesiness)! Also, there's a lot of cheesy Four coming your way. Enough about that, because here is the much anticipated party! I hope everyone likes this chapter, and hopefully I can upload in a week or two. Reminder that I'm only burrowing these characters, as they belong to Veronica Roth. Thanks for all the support and stay rad, little chicken wings x :)!**

The squeals of delight that my children exude are loud and prominent when they see people start to fill up the house.

"Surprise papa?" Will asks, curiosity making his eyes sparkle.

"Yes, Will. This is it." I say, unable to contain the excitement myself. Uriah and his family are the first to arrive. "Hey, Zeke!" I clap him in the back with one arm while holding Will with the other. Uriah motions for Zeke to follow him, and they take their trays with them to the kitchen. I see Hanna enter while pushing Shauna along. Her legs have regained a bit of feel, thanks to some doctors that used to be Erudite and some from the airport. She still needs to be wheeled around, but she's always positive. She smiles at me, along with Hanna, and then Will stretches his arms towards them. "He's a hugger," I say sheepishly.

"Then he's unlike his parents," Shauna jokes. Hanna falls under Will's spell by grabbing him and taking him to play. I end up pushing Shauna. Her eyes show me gratitude, but she keeps joking. "You think I can't take it, Stiff?" I laugh. Shauna is laughing with me. "You're still so Abnegation sometimes."

"Welcome to the teasing club," Uriah says behind me.

"Shut up, you two." I say before turning to look for Natalie. I spot her going from arms to arms between Tris and Zeke. She's walking between them, getting more practice. She might learn how to run soon. "Want anything to drink?" I ask Uriah and Shauna. Uriah shakes his head and joins his mother in playing with my son. Shauna looks longingly, wishing to have a bit more energy to move like us, careless and without worries. "Shauna? Water, a fizz drink, or juice?"

"Um," she says, distracted. "Water's fine." I nod and head to the kitchen. I pass Tris, and see how much fun Natalie is having with her and Zeke. "Hey Tris, Shauna wants to play with the kids as well, but she can't move much." Tris nods and guides Natalie towards Shauna without questioning me. I return with several cups with water, some fizzy drinks, and several kinds of juice. It took me a while to get them all, and as I'm passing them around, I notice the decorations. Christina is here.

There's an endless amount of balloons, and the kids are still distracted with all the new people to play with, which makes me wonder how they're react when they do notice the balloons. I notice someone else helping Christina hang the last of some little paper balls. Shauna brought Hector and Lauren with her as well, but they seem to have arrived with Christina. Hector looks around, taking the house in. He looks at me briefly before turning to look at his legs. Natalie is tugging at his pants, and once she's aware she has his attention, she smiles and pulls at his hand. Surprised, he grabs her hand and goes to play with Shauna, Tris, and Zeke.

"Turns out you're not very Abnegation if you're celebrating your children's birthday." A slightly annoyed voice informs me.

"Lauren," I say, my voice monotone, doing my best to not give away my annoyance towards her comment. "How are you?" I ask, being polite.

"I'm great, Four," she says my nickname differently. I don't know exactly when, but slightly after Jeanine's death, she became hostile. I recall our friendship and internally cringe. Lauren is no longer Lauren, it's that simple. "Thanks for the invite."

She knows she wasn't invited. I would have preferred Lynn instead of her, but she's dead, and there's nothing we can do about it. "Sure," I say tensely. "Enjoy." I'm about to head to the bathroom to brood for a couple of minutes when I hear a car come to a stop outside. Tris is too busy attending the exhausted Christina by offering her something to drink, so I'm the one to answer the door.

"Tobias Eaton!" Matthew screams, and I give him a look that makes him chuckle nervously. He clears his throat and offers me a hand. I shake it and then I smile. I'm always joking with him, and he always follows along. "Are we early, or has the party started?" He's highly animated, and it's contagious. I'm smiling like an idiot, and once I see the car properly stationed, Amar and George get out, holding hands. My smile becomes wider.

"You're right on time," I greet with excitement. "Come on in!" That's everyone I invited. They're all here, and I hope that the kids are ready to enjoy what's about to come. Then I notice someone's missing from Matthew's company and I ask. "Wait, where's Cara?"

"She couldn't come, and she apologizes, but she chose the presents for your children. I'm just here to deliver." Matthew tells me with a smile.

Tris and I are no longer giving out snacks. We use the drinks Zeke brought and after making sure everyone has something to drink, we invite them to the dining room. A big table, courtesy of George, was laid out quickly and we all get plates pilled with the different foods available and we all gather around to eat. The kids don't come near Tris or myself during this. It initially saddens me, but upon noticing the smiles and bubbling laughter my kids erupt into every few minutes, I can support it.

"They look so happy," I tell Tris, getting a bit teary-eyed. If they're happy, I'm happy, that's how it has been since they were born.

"I'm so glad you convinced me to do this." Tris says, a note of happiness clear in her voice as well.

The dishes are practically spilling out of the sink, they're so many. I kick everyone who wants to help me wash them out of the kitchen and then begin my work. I hear someone come up behind me and I'm about to scream that I can do it just fine when Matthew speaks up.

"Don't get angry!" He tells me quickly.

I chuckle. "I don't want to bother anyone with this task."

A small smile spreads across Matthew's mouth. "Still Abnegation, huh?"

"People keep telling me that."

"Because you keep showing us you are." He tells me gently, using a voice that one would use on a child when it was being stubborn and refusing to see what it's done. Before I can even feel offended, Matthew keeps talking. "But that's not why I'm here." I lift an eyebrow without answering. "I have it. The ring you asked for." He says, hushing his voice, doing his best to confine his excitement. Seems like everyone's thrilled today.

I forget he was mocking me and I'm eager too. Along with it, I feel a pang of something else take a hold of me. It's hidden in my excitement, so I can't identify it yet, but I feel its presence. I hope it's not fear. "Let me finish this, and then I'll see it." Matthew nods before plunging his hands into the water and helping me finish much faster than anticipated. I know what it is. Gratitude. I'm feeling gratitude towards Matthew because if what he's just done for me. And I don't mean the dishes. I hear someone come in.

"You let him help you but not me?" Uriah pretends to sound betrayed.

"I don't know why you sound annoyed if you hate washing dishes," I say sarcastically.

"I don't hate it," he explains. "I just know I have better things to do." He says playfully. "Anyways, what gives?"

"Tobias is going to propose." Matthew blurs out. I punch his arm and he rubs it. "I can keep the ring, you know." He threatens me jokingly. "Or I can give it to Tris before you do."

"Now that's just cold." Uriah tells us.

"Let me see it," I say, my voice full of curiosity. "Please." I remember my manners afterwards.

"Sure," we all stop being playful once Matthew pulls out a small dark blue box – it's alike the color of my eyes. He opens it slowly, building the suspense. I'm tempted to pull it out of his hands and opening it quickly myself but I notice that my nerves are what's making me impatient. "It's not an expensive, or beautiful ring, but it's a ring nonetheless." Matthew chews his bottom lip as he explains. "It's the only one I could find on such a short notice."

"Are you kidding?" Uriah screams. He's practically speaking for me, because I'm stupefied by the ring nestled in the box. "It's beautiful. I'm sure Tris will love it." Matthew still looks at me, awaiting my reaction. Uriah stays silent this time, and I nod to show my approval. Matthew passes me the box and Uriah gets his voice back and begins to chatter. "Hey, sorry to abuse, but can you get me one as well?" He asks as he grabs Matthew by the shoulders and walks out of the kitchen. Uriah knows me well enough to tell that I want to be alone for a while.

The simple ring is more than what I hoped for. It shines brightly, though I can tell it's not new. A single diamond rests at the crown of the ring. The slim but strong band winks under the light, making me smile. I hope Tris doesn't think this is too extravagant. And if she does, she'll have to deal with it in front of all of our friends. I take a deep breath, and get ready.

Nerves, nerves, nerves. They don't consume me, because I don't let them, but they are there, on the border, ready to flood me with fear. If I was afraid to ask her to marry me when we were alone, I'm terrified now. Uriah and Matthew keep giving each other knowing looks, while everyone goes to the living room to relax after such a huge meal. My heart thunders when I see Tris deep in conversation with Shauna and Christina. As I contemplate on which way to propose, I feel my heart jump to my throat, and I actually consider not proposing for a whole minute. I stand there, paralyzed, getting attention before I even begin.

Tris. Tris. Tris. I didn't celebrate her birthday. She deserves this.

I discretely wipe my hands on my shirt and pinch myself to root myself and focus on what I am about to do. Taking a deep breath, I grab an empty glass and tap on it with my nails, getting the full attention of everyone. I mentally slap myself when I realize I have no speech planned out. There's no way I can get out of this one. Even though the only ones looking at me are people I know, people I trust and I'm comfortable with, I'm on the brink of kicking them all out before proposing.

This is a step closer to Tris being my wife.

"Thanks," I nod towards Christina and Shauna when they pat the kids in the back and begin to rock them to silence them. "Okay, as you all know, we're here to celebrate my children's birthday." Everyone whoops and cheers. For a couple of seconds, I'm in Dauntless. Then I'm back home. "I know it's not very Abnegation, as some of you have been mocking." I look at Uriah pointedly, and at Shauna. There's lots of laughter, because both accept the blame. "But the minute they were born, I knew they deserved more than what I ever got. And as you all know, I've made it my life's mission to ensure their safety and their happiness." Tris has tears in her eyes, and Christina is squeezing her hand and rubbing her arm from time to time. And to think I'm making this up as I go. I gain a bit of confidence and keep going. "What most of you aren't aware of, is the fact that Tris is now twenty four." Christina and Shauna look offended, and everyone else looks at Tris to confirm if it's true. I smile weakly under her watery stare. "And even though she wants to keep her birthday hidden, like a true Abnegation," I stop when everyone laughs. "I know when it is now, so I'll definitely celebrate it in the future." I smile widely now, and everyone cheers again, with Uriah and Zeke whistling. "She may not have gotten a birthday present from me on the actual day of her birth, but she will now."

I put my hand in my pocket, with everyone's eyes on me. The atmosphere is charged with curiosity and expectation. I see yet another exchange of looks between Matthew and Uriah. I turn to look at Tris and my legs are braver than myself when they plant me in front of her. I'm gripping the box with everything I've got, as if it were a lifeline. In a sense, it is; it's a lifeline to a new life, to a better life, with Tris and my son and my daughter; my family. My grip on the box is biting me, cutting deeply into my palm, but I use that pain to focus and avoid the nerves. I ask Tris for her hand without a word, only a simple smile on my face. She accepts and walks with me, confused.

"The last time I did this, we were on top of a building." With that sentence, she knows. Her eyes blink hard, and she doesn't cry. Her posture tells me she doesn't want to, she won't allow herself to cry. "And I didn't have what I have now." My hands are big enough to cover the box, but from my peripheral vision, I see Matthew and Uriah whispering among themselves. I swallow and speak. "I won't let you go, so don't let go of me." And I'm on one knee, the box is opened, resting on my palm, and our audience makes a collected gasp. "Everything we've been through, everything we've fought over, everything we've overcome, it was bound to come to this. I love you, Beatrice Prior." As I say her name, her full name, I can't stop marveling at how precious it sounds when it's said aloud. "I want something more, I want this happening right here."

Even without Tris' response, the girls are clapping. I see Hanna is crying, and Christina passes Will to Amar before crying in Uriah's arms. Hector takes Natalie from Shauna when he sees she's crying as well. Tris looks like she wants to speak but I put my hand up.

"I have to ask first." This makes everyone laugh again, and even though my knee is soaking up the coldness from the floor, I still take my time. "Would you accept being my wife?"

She bites her bottom lip. "Yes," she whispers. That's when everyone explodes. I get up after placing the ring on her finger. I discard the straw one, but Tris picks it up and puts it away. We kiss while our friends clap and cheer around us. I hug her, whispering in her ear.

"Happy late birthday."

"Is this what you planned?"

"Yeah." Before she can answer, Will and Natalie are taken to their cribs for a brief nap. That's when I see Lauren in a corner of the house. I don't notice Tris until she's walking up to her. While Amar and George congratulate me, I keep an eye on my girl while thanking them again for coming.

"I'm in the mood for dancing." George tells Amar.

"Well, you're in luck, boys," Matthew comes up behind me, clearly eavesdropping. "I've got a tablet loaded with music." Once the music begins to fill up the house, and everyone hunts down a partner, I go to where Tris and Lauren are chatting.

When I get there, after the hugs and good luck wishes from my friends, it seems that they've wrapped up their conversation. I see Lauren smiling and giving Tris a tight hug.

"I needed that," I manage to hear as she heads to the door. I'm right behind without them knowing. "Congratulations. Honestly." Her voice sounds honest. "And I expect you to keep in touch. You know how." And with that she leaves. I decide to come out of my hiding place then.

"Tris?"

"Lauren left." She tells me in a sad tone. "She wasn't up for a festive mood. She apologized and left." I nod, unsure of what Lauren told Tris. I hope she gets better soon.

"Let's dance." I say, feeling the corner of my mouth lift in a half smile. "Everyone else is." Taking her hand, I pull her along. "We should enjoy the party while it lasts." The loud notes and deep vibes of the music Matthew provided makes everyone end up exhausted but happy. We move, jump, and scream along to most of the songs for more than an hour.

I'm sixteen again, attending the party the Dauntless threw after initiation was over. I danced with Zeke and Shauna. I felt like an extra, but whenever I tried to walk away, they'd pull me back in. We ended up drinking a lot of alcohol, and all the chocolate muffins at the snack table. We ditched the party with several other friends, including Tori, George, and Amar to go play Dare. We drained too many bottles of alcohol that night.

We stop when the kids wake up due to all the noise. And with them awake, comes the cake. Up until this point, I'm surprised Tris isn't holding her camera. But upon closer inspection, it's being passed around, which means that this whole event is in the records. Uriah and Zeke bring out the cake they prepared, and my eyes widen upon seeing it.

Chocolate frosting covers the enormous two tire cake. More frosting, blue and pink now, adorns the edges and corners of the cake. In white chocolate letters at the center of the cake, Will and Natalie's names are visible. Stars, and flowers and other shapes crowd Natalie's side, and the color is appealing to the eyes. Balloons, moons and boats decorate Will's side. I love it; I instantly love the cake. And if the bread is chocolate as well, I'll devour it on my own. I haven't had Dauntless cake in years. Will jumps in my arms, enthusiasm evident all over his face. Natalie's in Tris' arms, clapping loudly.

"How old are they again?" Christina asks while holding thin candles in her hands. The Candor added candles to the cake, asking the birthday person to blow the candles right before it was cut. I don't recall seeing this in Dauntless, but I'm sure they'd have done something similar.

"Three years old." I say while watching her place three blue ones on Will's side and three pink ones in Natalie's, confusion clouding her eyes. Apparently, everyone hears me. They all start asking why we didn't celebrate their previous birthdays, and since they're doing it at the same time, I decide to shrug and I make motions with my hand that I'll explain later. Amar brings matches from the kitchen under Tris' instructions and helps in lighting the candles.

"I heard that the Amity used to sing a song before the candles were blown and the cake was cut," Uriah begins. "But I'm not sure if it's true or not." He looks around, expecting one of us to telling him something, or to burst into song, but it doesn't happen. One, none of us came from Amity, even before our choosing ceremonies. And two, because we aren't good singers and we can't invent a song out of nowhere. The candles are burning away as we look at each other, some confused and some indifferent, when the bell rings. Tris smiles, and I'm sure she thinks it could be Caleb. If that's true, this party is officially over. Tris passes Natalie to Zeke and rushes to the door.

"You made it!" She yells happily. I have no idea who it is, as I've stayed in the living room, but I can tell it's not Caleb as the person replies.

"Well, you did invite us." Even though it's still a man's voice, this one sounds spirited and happy, something that Caleb does not, as hard as he tries.

"Did we make it on time? I hope we're not late." Another voice speaks, this time, a woman. I look at everyone, and most of them are confused, alike myself, with whom it could be. The only one smiling knowingly is Christina.

"We're still partying, that's for sure. Come on in," Tris still sounds happy, and when I'm able to see who's shown up, I'm still at a loss at to whom it is. A man walks in, dressed in jeans and an orange shirt, along with a two other people, a man and woman. Before I can even ask, I tell Hector to blow the candles and get replacements with Christina as Tris calls me over.

"I'll hold Will if you want," Shauna tells me, and I do. The kids are so comfortable with the new company, I'm sure they'll be fine while I talk with the new arrivals.

I stare at the first guy who walked in, trying to recall if I've seen him somewhere before; his face looks familiar. He's blond, and so is the girl, which I assume is the one who talked with Tris once the door was opened. The third person has his arm around the girl's shoulders, and I guess they're together. The clothes they have on is alike the first guy – a mix of colors.

"This is Robert," Tris tells me. "Robert Black." Of course. Tris talked to him for a while when we went to visit the fence during her initiation. I told her to cut her old ties because she could get in trouble... And because I was jealous. "He used to be my neighbor in Abnegation. This is his sister, Susan."

"I remember her," I blur out. "From our time with the Amity."

"Yeah," Tris gives me a smile. "I was sure you didn't invite them." She sees the look on my face and doesn't give me the opportunity to talk. "And not because you didn't want to, but because you simply don't cross paths with them." She's still smiling. "I did get lucky the other day and I happened to spot Susan while helping with the rationing, so, I decided to invite her." She gives me an apologetic look, which is strange. It's not like I'll get mad at her for doing this. She wanted to invite her friends for a special occasion, so she had a right to do it. I smile before answering.

"That's great!" I clap Robert in the back, but he can't do the same due to the two colorful boxes he's holding between his arms. Susan holds a blue bag while the other man, who hasn't spoken a word since arriving, holds a red one. "Well, come, join us. We're about to cut some cake. But if you're hungry, you can eat first."

"We ate, which is why we're late." Robert explains. "Oh, by the way," he suddenly says, as if just noticing something. "This is Gregory. He's married to my sister. They're going to have a baby." Robert beams, and Tris hugs Susan.

"Is that why you ate before coming?" Tris asks Susan as they walk into the living room. They continue their conversation as I stay with the men.

"Robert," Gregory speaks up. "We need to give these gifts to the proper recipients." And just like that, he's chatting and opening up.

"Well, if you come right this way, you can put them here." I point to the rest of the boxes and bags that have made their way to the gifts table. "You're just in time for the cake."

"That's what we've heard." Robert jokes, smiling. That gets us all to laugh.

"So do we sing the song or not?" Uriah asks again.

"Uri, we don't even know if there is a song." Hector speaks up, and it's the first time I've heard him speak all day.

"Song or not, we're lighting the candles and the kids will blow them before we waste any more of them," Christina says as she asks Amar to relight the candles with hand motions.

"You want to sing the song?" Gregory asks.

"We hear the Amity used to have a song, but we have no friends from Amity to ask," Uriah comment makes me smile. I know Robert is Amity, and the way he and Gregory talk and interact, I can tell he's known him for some time. And Gregory rings a bell, he's part of a memory rooted deep down. Gregory? Gregory. Zellner, Gregory. I lift an eyebrow as I remember. My Choosing Ceremony. He's also from Amity. We've got two of them, so if there's song, we'll know in no time.

Robert opens his mouth to talk, as does Gregory, but I motion for them to keep quiet. Tris is too busy getting our son back from Shauna to hear Uriah. "Ah," I begin sarcastically. "See, we used to have friends from Amity but they couldn't come. If only we could ask them."

"Are you referring to my brother and my husband?" Susan says once she hears me.

"Susan, we were going to prank the kid." Gregory grins, and Uriah looks at me, pretending to be offended.

"It was a good try." I smile. "But since we have some people who used to be Amity here, let's ask if the rumors are true or not." It's a good thing Amar still hasn't lit the candles, or we would be wasting them a second time, what, with all this talk.

"Oh, there's a song, alright," Robert tells us. Shauna and Hanna look up, excited. Hector and Uriah start smiling, as if already planning to scream the song rather than sing it. Everyone else is looking at Robert attentively. "You want us to sing it?" Tris' eyes are bright with excitement and I get Natalie from George. She went from arm to arm, apparently, because I recall seeing Tris passing her onto Zeke. We both nod and Robert, Susan, and Gregory burst into song.

"Today's gonna be a-okay!

'Cause we're celebrating your birthday!

Happy birthday, lovely twins

Celebrating your birthday!"

"Oh, it's so nice!" Tris squeals. After a few more rounds, we pick up the words, and soon find out that it sounds even better while clapping.

"We should do one with each of their names!" George suggests.

"Alright!" Hanna and her sons say at the same time. And as we sing, Christina lights the candles.

"Today's gonna be a-okay!

'Cause we're celebrating your birthday!

Happy birthday, Natalie!

Celebrating your birthday!"

Natalie claps along with us, clearly enjoying the song.

"Today's gonna be a-okay!

'Cause we're celebrating your birthday!

Happy birthday, Will!

Celebrating your birthday!" Will smiles and then shies away at the mention of his name. He buries his face in Tris' hair. We sing the song one last time and clap, cheer, and whistle to wrap it up.

"Okay, Natalie," I grab my daughter's attention. "Are you ready for the candles?" She nods, even though I'm not sure if she knows what I'm talking about. I try to teach her how to blow quickly, and she laughs when I blow on her face. "Now you," I say, pointing at her to try it. She picks it up in no time, and when she sees the flame of the candles, she blows at them confidently. Will is different. He doesn't want to even try, and ends up squirming in Tris' arms.

"Tobias, take Will." Tris struggles to tell me. "He's moving too much and I'm afraid I'll drop him."

"Sure," I look at her, smiling. "Pass him over." Once I have Will, Natalie goes with Tris. "What's wrong?" Asking Will what's wrong is a good idea, because he answers quickly.

"Papa, no." He tells me as he shakes his little head.

"No, what?"

"No, no." He could be afraid of the fire.

"Will, it's alright," I speak to him in a hushed tone, as if only we were in the room. "You want me to teach you how?" Patiently, I wait for him to nod or shake his head.

"Nana?" He asks as he puffs up his cheeks and then pretends to blow.

"Yeah, she already did." I tell him. "It's your turn." I point at his chest and he shakes his head again. "Yes, you can. Look," And I'm blowing softly in front of him, hoping he understands what I'm trying to teach him. After he tries it, I lower him a little towards the cake and he cringes against my chest. He grabs my hair desperately. I know what's wrong. He's afraid to fall. "Will, it is okay," I try to soothe him. "I won't let you go. You'll be alright." He looks at me, terrified. "Maybe we should just blow the candles together. How about that?" I point at both of us and then blow some air on his head, making him giggle. He nods, and I know he understood. "Ready? One, two, three!" We're near the cake again, and I pretend to blow as Will does it all on his own. The candles are out.

Upon cutting the actual cake, I contain my excitement when I see the inside. It is chocolate! So much like the one they used to make at Dauntless. Christina and Uriah take the kids from Tris and me when I end up cutting the cake. Robert and Tris, showing some of their ex-Abnegation tendencies, begin to give it out as I place it into plates. The one providing the plates is none other than Susan. We're like a typical Abnegation unit, with the addition of Hanna Pedrad. She helps by adding a fork and a blueberry muffin before Tris or Robert whisk the plate away. I sneakily cut myself a huge slice once everyone, including my children, already has cake. I sit in a chair, all alone, contently watching my friends and my family enjoy what's going on.

Will has frosting on his nose, and he makes everyone laugh when he calls for Tris and then plants a sticky kiss on her cheek. He begins to attack Uriah, Zeke, Shauna, and Hector afterward, and they don't seem to mind. Natalie's with George, Amar, and Matthew, and she has them wrapped around her finger. This is my life, my family, these are my friends. And this is my happiness. I couldn't ask for anything more, because my children and my soon-to-be-wife are so happy. My friends are here, enjoying and celebrating something that doesn't matter to anyone else but us. We have something special, something unique. Will comes up to me, and gives me a huge kiss to make the night even better.

The kids have basically prepared themselves for round two by taking their nap. As soon as we're all done with our fillings of cake – which is spectacular, by the way – the kids point at the boxes and ask what they are.

"Papa, look!" Will says, both confused and excited at the same time. "What, papa?"

"Those are surprises for you and Nana." Talking to him is so easy. Natalie is a bit harder to understand in terms of talk. But she's easier to engage with than her brother. Will is shy; he only talks or plays with you when he likes or knows you. Natalie's open for anything.

"Mine?" He arches an eyebrow.

"Some of them, not all." I explain softly. He smiles, and I take it he understood me. Then I see Tris' famous camera make its reappearance, and I know we're about to do something huge. Tris has Natalie trailing her, and both make their way to the gifts table. Of course. They're going to open their presents.

To be honest, I'm grateful that anyone bothered to bring them actual presents. Everyone who's here, apart from Robert, his sister, and her husband, helped me and Tris with one thing or another to make this celebration a reality. It's already such a huge gratitude that they took the time to look for something to get for my children. The colorful bags and stacked up boxes make me realize that my children are truly privileged to be living in a world like this. If Tris and I hadn't sacrificed so much to get here, where would we be? Where would our children be? I'm so happy they get to have this happiness, this freedom, and this liberty to do whatever they wish. I would never want them exposed to what I lived in for eighteen years.

"Tobias?" Tris pulls me back. She never lets me get too lost, or too far. Her voice pulled me back when I was under the simulation attack, and it still does to this day.

"I'm good," I tell her, picking up Will and going to her. "Is this being filmed?" Matthew and Shauna give me a thumbs up, which means we're more than good to go. "They're gonna open their presents now. But before they do, I'm making a speech."

"You're not running for leader, Four!" Uriah starts the teasing and yelling.

"Uriah Pedrad, you be nice to this man, this father who is trying to say something good on behalf of his kids!" Hanna scolds him.

"It's okay," I intervene before Uriah gets into any more trouble. "Hanna, I always joke with him this way, it's completely fine!" Grinning at Hanna seems to do the trick and Uriah keeps on joking. I clear my throat before I begin. "What can I say?" I start nervously.

"Would you like a stage?" Again, Uriah mocks me. But this time, before he can laugh and get everyone to laugh with him, I see Hanna smack him in the head. "Ow," he says loudly.

"Okay, thank you," Smiling around, I try to get rid of my nerves. How did the Abnegation leaders do this? "I'm tremendously happy that you were all able to make it and that you helped us in celebrating the kids' birthday. Thank you so much for the cake, the food, the drinks, the decorations, and all the other things you guys brought for this party to happen. And for finding the time to get them something special after that." I clench my teeth when I feel them coming. I'm going to cry, and I don't want to. I'm supposed to be happy! This is for my kids! "I just can't believe they're three years old." I hug Will and he sees my tears. His little fingers brush them away, and he kisses my cheek before tugging my ears and putting his hand on my other cheek. This only makes me want to cry more, but at the same time, it comforts me. "They're growing up so fast. But that's okay. They're gonna be okay." I meant to keep that part to myself, or to say it to Will only; but since everyone got quiet during my little speech, they all hear me.

Comforting mutters of 'I'm sure they'll be okay' and 'you have nothing to worry about' rise up around me, and they calm me, alike a reassuring blanket of safety and warmth. My crying is due to this irrational new fear that this is all a lie. That my children are not safe, and the faction system will come back. I try to push it to the back of my mind, but it haunts me now. My nightmares have been absence for now, but I never know when they'll be teeming in my mind again. I want to get rid of it all. I don't want to be broken any longer.

"Well, that was a beautiful speech, Tobias." Tris kisses me after telling me this. I give her a smile. "I hope you're ready for what's coming, because it's time to open the presents!" Natalie and Will squeal loudly, and Tris and I begin to sort through their presents. I take Will's and she takes Natalie's. They pick what they want to open first, and so it begins. I decide to sit crossed-legged on the floor, so Will can come to me easily.

Natalie starts, and she picks a slim box wrapped in light purple and sky blue. She rips the soft paper away and opens the box to find a tablet. I look at Matthew, and he looks fascinated. This gift is too much, and as everyone is clapping, Natalie looks confused. The clapping gets replaced by laughs and Natalie smiles widely before giving the tablet to Tris. We share a look, and before we can say anything, Matthew gets everyone to ask Will to open his presents. He chooses to open a blue bag, and inside, we see wooden cars and trains. Will's excitement is clear in his face, and he comes and hugs me. Everyone laughs, and Susan, Robert, and Gregory beam at each other.

"Will, go say thank you." I whisper.

"Papa?" He whispers back.

"I didn't give this to you. Your mother's friends did. Go say thank you."

"Tank you?" He asks me, confused.

"Yes, you better go right now."

"Who?"

"When I ask who Susan is, you go to her. Okay?"

"Yes, papa!" He says loudly. Everyone hears him now, and they look confused.

"Hey, Susan, can you raise your hand?" I ask. Confused, she does it, and Will runs up to her and thanks her. Then he hugs Gregory. I'm about to call him back when he decides to hug everyone else. They all start crying, but I clear my throat and shake my head furiously. "We still have a lot of presents to go. You can't cry whenever they open one." Throaty chuckles and feeble smiles respond back. "That's Tris' job." That gets them all laughing, including Tris. I'm surprised when I notice she isn't crying. She's definitely getting better.

Natalie decides this time around to open the red bag, the one alike the one Will just opened. Out of it she pulls out wooden dolls. Two girls with straw blonde hair – its yarn – and two boys with black hair – which is just more yarn. She asks Tris who the gift is from and she nods towards Susan and Gregory. The same ensues, except Natalie only hugs Susan and Gregory. If Will hugs everyone each time he opens a present, the tear flow will be heavy.

Will opens a small box next. It's wrapped in black paper, and if it weren't for that fact that it had his name on it, Tris could have ended up giving the wrong box to Natalie, as she got one as well. Inside, we see a bracelet of sorts. Black strings adorned with orange and red and yellow ones. The color ones are less, but they're the most noticeable. In silver letters, at the center of the bracelet, we can see Will's name.

"It's adjustable." Shauna says. "So as he grows, the bracelet will always fit." I look at Hector, who's sitting crossed-legged on the floor next to Shauna and he smiles too. Upon finding who has spoken, Will goes to Hector and Shauna and gives her the bracelet and then puts his hand out.

"Please?" He asks before she places the bracelet on his little wrist. Then she ties the knots along the band of the bracelet and makes it look like the size is perfect. "Tanks." We all laugh and Will comes into my arms as he waits for his sister to open her next present.

And so it goes. Will and Natalie alternate between opening presents until they've all been opened up. They got so many new toys to play with, as well as jewelry and some clothes. They hugged and thanked everyone, which got them all to cry. Will is too overwhelmed with everything he got that he sits in the middle of his things and plays with the necklace Christina and Uriah got him. Natalie is a different story. She picks something up and plays with it for a while before moving on to the next. Once she's tested all the toys, she picks her favorite and plays with it.

As twins, some people got them the same thing, with their names engraved in each as a difference. All the ex-Dauntless, Uriah and Christina, and Shauna and Zeke all got them jewelry. Amar, George, and Matthew – or the airport people, as I call them sometimes – got them technology and science things, something that I expect would have included Caleb if he would have bothered to come. And Susan, Gregory, and Robert, the most passive due to them being Abnegation and Amity, got them homemade things; things made out of wood and things that were made by their own hands. Hanna on the other hand, got them their first sets of black clothes.

"For your little Dauntless babes," she said with a sheepish smile that made Tris and I laugh softly.

Will calls for me and asks me to help him clean up his toys while Robert and Gregory help Tris in cleaning up the mess the opening of the gifts made. I look to find Natalie playing with Hector and I rush to help Will when I see he's trying to lift all of his presents at once and several fall off his arms. I take it all and he takes the fallen ones and we go to the room. I open the box Tris asked me to build for Will's toys and sort out the ones that can be put there and then take the rest and put them on the shelf, which is something else Tris asked me to build.

When the kids are finally asleep for the night, people begin to leave. We decide to give away all the food, and when the first group leaves, I give them several containers. Tris is in the kitchen, sorting through the food and putting in containers as I give them away to people. Pastas, soup, salads, and cake are all neatly packed up and ready to go. Everyone tries to refuse to take them until I threaten that I will bring Tris out if they don't accept the food. They all leave with their arms full and slowly, the house quiets down until it's down to Uriah, Christina, Tris and myself.

"You're staying," Tris says immediately. "You must be exhausted." We all crash onto the various couches in the living room.

"Of course we're staying." Christina says before rubbing her eyes. She must be too tired to argue. "We'll help you clean up tomorrow."

"Since when did we turn into Abnegation?" Uriah jokes sleepily.

"Shut up, Uri." Christina tries to slap his arm but her aim is sloppy and she hits his knee. She rubs her hand and gets up groggily. "Let's go to bed. I'm super tired."

"She's not even my wife and she's bossing me around." Uri ducks as he says this, and Christina groans. She doesn't attempt to hit him again, but she goes to the guest room looking grumpy.

Tris looks at me, and I smile. "We should head to bed as well." I stifle a yawn. "Tomorrow will be a crazy cleanup day." I get a nod and then she tugs my hand as she drags me to our room.

"I hope everyone makes it home safely." She tells me once we're lying in bed.

"Mmh," I mutter sleepily. "Goodnight." She snuggles closer. I don't get a reply, and I'm too exhausted to ask anything more. Wrapped around each other, with the soft cover and the cool air coming in through the window, we drift off to quiet, blissful, well-deserved sleep.


	6. Run Boy Run

**So I've failed miserably. I've been gone for a really long time. To all the people that I've forced to wait all this time, I swear there's a really good explanation as to why I haven't uploaded anything. So my mom got inside my room and cleaned it and in doing so accidentally threw out my laptop's charger. It's been a while since that happened and I'm borrowing my cousin's charger for the time being. I'll try (and I truly mean try!) to get more than one chapter uploaded today. Once again, there's a huge possibility this has spelling mistakes as I got nobody to proofread. I apologize again, for having left you hanging. Hope you like this chapter! Friendly reminder that I'm only borrowing the characters. They belong to Veronica, not me! Stay rad as heck, little peeps ox**

It's been two months since the kids' party and Tris and I are about to get a week off of work in about three days. Tris and Christina have already decided on what to do during that week, and if Christina and Uriah will come over or if we'll stay over at their place.

Will and Natalie have been more chatty than usual, and more of their words make sense, which makes me proud and sad. It's not that I don't want them to grow up, but I want them to always be the babies I wake up at midnight to take care of. Their sleeping patterns are getting more constant, and they don't wake up at midnight anymore. On the few occasions that they do, I do my best to make them as long as possible. I know they're coming to an end.

With three days to go before break, I decide to check if anyone has sent me anything on the computer and I notice a small note from Matthew. I'm rubbing my eyes, so it takes me a while to see the new message.

_Tobias,_

_Cara still feels bad for not being able to go to your children's birthday party, so she wants to know if she can go this coming weekend. Please let us know so we can make plans. See you soon, hopefully._

_Matthew._

"Hey, Tris!" I get up and go looking for her. I poke my head into the kids' room and I see they still haven't woken up. I look into all the rooms but one and when I can't find her, I smile and sneak into the bathroom, the one room I decided not to check. She's humming again. I never imagined her as a person who would want to sing, or hum, but here she is, taking me by surprise again. I'm tempted to go in with her when I notice she's just starting to take a shower.

Through the glass door, I can see her, and I lean on the door frame as I watch her under the water. Her back is to the glass, so she doesn't see me. She gets under the water and lets out a moan as it cascades all over her body. She stands there, motionless, and I see her rigid back begin to loosen up. Her tattoos stand out on her pale skin. The Dauntless flames on one shoulder and the Abnegation hands on the other. Her breathing becomes slow and steady; she is relaxed. I smile – what I wouldn't give to see her like this all the time.

In Dauntless, when I first met her, she was a storm. She was young, and she had a different perspective of things, and she was proud, and stubborn. As I pulled her from the net, her eyes where bright, insistent, demanding. She always strived to be cruel, and fearless, to prove her worth and be better than everyone else; or at least, better than Peter and the rest of the transfers. Doing these things made her reckless and a bit crazy, I admit, but it was who she was. She was learning, with my help, to understand that Dauntless wasn't all cruelty. Dauntless wasn't just beating people up, or proving your worth, or being cruel enough that people feared you. Dauntless was more than that. Dauntless was what Amar taught me. Defending, standing up for others, making each other feel safe, and helping each other overcome our fears.

Of course, when Eric came, he messed the scheme up for some of the others. He didn't make it to me, or the Dauntless-born like Zeke and Shauna. Even as I saw all that cruelty creep in, I believed Dauntless wasn't always that. Then again, I found refuge there for the wrong reasons. I went there because I was afraid of the monster in my house, because I had so much rage in me, because I was always so broken.

I remember the Tris from the airport. She was desperate for answers, and she felt so betrayed by everything. If she was angry in Dauntless, her time in the airport made her furious. Even though we were angry with each other and our genetics – which is something we could never change – we made the right call when leaving that place before anything happened to either of us.

I clear my throat, starling her. "I'm sorry if I sacred you." I grin. "You know our plans for the weekend?" She nods as she blushes and covers her chest. Typical Tris. "Cara wants to come, because she feels bad about not coming two months ago." She's still looking at me with wide eyes, indignant. "What do I answer? Yes or no?"

"What?" She asks, her voice high-pitched.

"Matthew is going to come with Cara. Because she couldn't come for the kids' party and she feels bad about it."

"Oh, yes," she mumbles vaguely as she goes back to showering. "Tell them they can come."

"Will do." I chew my lip before adding something else. "Sorry for scaring you again." With that I leave, closing the door softly. I rush to the computer and type my reply quickly. I want to let them know about our decision as soon as possible, because Matthew sent me that note two days ago and I've forgotten to check my mail these past couple of days. I click send just as Tris enters the kitchen while drying her hair. There goes my chance to shower with her. I see her reach for a bowl, and then the milk and some cereal. I go check on the kids before I shower and I see they aren't awake yet. I go to the bathroom and take my time, relaxing alike Tris when the cool water pinpricks my shoulder blades and neck. After using the soap on my hair, I scrub the rest of my body. Even though I'd like to stay longer in the bathroom, I know I have to hurry and help Tris with the kids.

I finish passing my towel through my hair when Will runs up to me and tugs my arms. "Hey," I tell him with a smile. "You want to play?"

"No, papa. Jump. I want to jump!" He says joyfully, pointing at the bed. I look at him, not sure if I should let him do this. If he falls, he could get seriously injured, and Tris would kill me. Besides, I don't want anything to happen to him.

"Are you sure about this?" I look at him, and he frowns a little, thinking it through. He grins after a while, and I consider not looking at him or else I'll give in.

He nods before telling me what he wants. "Bed, papa. I jump to your arms." I freeze after he tells me this. I clench my jaw to keep my tears in, I don't want him to see me cry. I'm both proud and in shock, but it was time this happened. Will is a shy kid, but when he speaks, he prefers to say the words. Natalie would say nonsense, because she'd want to show off. I smile at him and he looks up at me, expecting my answer. Erudite; his body language is Erudite.

"Alright," he waves his arms, asking me to carry him. I stoop down and look at him in the eyes. His smirk goes away and he's serious now, alike myself. "But here's the deal." He nods. "No, you have to wait for me to tell you the deal," I laugh and he giggles before I continue. "If you fall, you can't cry."

"Fall? Off the bed?" He asks, skeptical. "No, papa, no." He shakes his head and puts his face in his hands before looking at me again. "You catch me." He smiles again and I stick my hand out.

"Deal." He squeals as he shakes my hand. "If you fall, I'll get you ice cream. And you can't tell your mom, okay?" He nods one more time. Impatient, he runs behind me and jumps onto my back. Before I toss him on the bed, I wonder where Natalie is. Will squirms in my arms, and flops onto the bed.

We stop playing after about an hour, because a) Will miscalculated several times and if it weren't for my reflexes, he would have fallen on the floor b) Tris is making the kids' breakfast and needs me to watch Natalie and c) Tris heard our laughter and grew suspicious. He doesn't want to stop, but I tell him we're going to get his sister and sneak back to play. He's face lights up at the idea and I enter the kitchen with him on my shoulders.

My forehead is covered in sweat from the exercise of catching Will and he's bright red from laughter, which doesn't go well with Tris. She starts to ask me questions, and I look for Nana to avoid having to lie about what Will and I where up to a few minutes ago.

Natalie is near the couch in the living room, and I lift Will from my shoulders and grip him with one arm while picking Natalie up with the other. They begin to laugh and scream, and I slowly go down on the floor. I cross my legs and put my son on one and my daughter on the other. I hold them down as they try to escape me, and I begin to tickle them. Will's face glows a darker red and Natalie's laughing freely, exposing her mouth full of little teeth. Tris pokes her head out of the kitchen and is about to tell us breakfast is ready when the doorbell rings. We look at each other and exchange a quick glance before the kids reclaim my attention. It's not any of our friends, because they come in three days, not earlier.

The last time Christina tried to surprise Tris through Uriah, he ended up with a bloody nose. We try to avoid making each other bleed. I doubt it'll be them or Cara with Matthew. They also said they'll come on the day our break begins. I try to get up but Tris motions with her facial expression that it's okay, she'll be the one to answer the door. I'm on the floor, chasing my children on all fours when I hear Tris open the door.

A sixth sense puts me on alert, as if _something_ or _someone_ is putting everything I love in danger. A cold, nonexistent air puts me on edge, and it feels off. I try to shake it away, but time seems to slow down. The sounds around me become muffled, and the laughter of my children is muted, along with Tris' language to the stranger at the door. The cold air spreads, coating me in ice. It does not matter who I am, or what I've become. I am made of ice, and if I'm moved in any direction, I will topple and shatter into millions of pieces. I'll be scattered on the floor, broken, for my children to see. I will become what I always was, what I've always been. Broken. I will always be broken.

There's commotion at the front door, as if Tris were doing her best to stop the stranger from coming in. My kids notice my change and begin to pull at my hair, and shake my head. My mind is sluggish to reach, but I slowly regain control. I'm not ice, and I won't shatter. I don't want it to happen, not when my children are here. If they see the real me, they won't know who I am anymore.

"Tobias, take them to their room!" Tris' voice is all I focus on, and I look down at my kids. They look at me and can tell something is wrong. They make no sound, and I shake my head roughly before I react. Tris' shout is terse, and I know who's here. I understand why I felt what I felt.

_*Flashback*_

_A heavy blow lands on my face, and if I escape, it'll be no use. If I try to prevent the beating, a belt will make an appearance. I try to stop my hands from going to my face and instead get up and face my father again._

_"You're making me do something I do not want to do, son," he dares. He dares to call me his son. I do not know who this creature is. It certainly isn't my father. I've already endured enough of this to know that I should keep my mouth shut until it ends. I'm not even allowed to cry in pain. I'm not allowed to make a sound. "This is to teach you a lesson. If you don't learn this now, when will you?" He tries to look sympathetic, but it's not something that works on him. I can see through him. "And if you don't learn it today, I'll have to beat you until you do."_

_I know he's going to make me bleed. My mother is in the kitchen, and she slowly does the dishes, silently watching. I take punch after punch, doing my best to not black out, and getting up each time I fall._

_"Did you learn your lesson, Tobias?" He asks softly, his demeanor cold and detached. I can't spit the blood out, my lip is swollen. And even if I could spit the blood out, he'd think I'm doing it towards him and I'll get yet another beating. I try to swallow the blood, but my throat refuses to do so. In the time it takes me to reply, he grows impatient. "Tobias. Did you learn your lesson?" The second time he asks, he's more forceful. I can only manage to nod, and I do it. Big mistake. "Do not disrespect me, Tobias. It is disrespectful and selfish to not answer when a question is asked. You didn't learn it, did you?"_

_"I did," my mumble causes him to get angry again, and he goes for the belt this time. "Dad, I did."_

_"Dad?"_

_"Sir. I learned it, sir." It's not use. He's taking small steps towards me. I take a deep breath, and brace myself for the second beating._

_*Flashback over*_

It's him. Will and Natalie are still looking at me attentively, and I take them by surprise when I scoop them up in a heartbeat and take them to their room. They're still quiet in my arms, as if they know they aren't allowed to talk. I rush to their room just as Marcus manages to get past Tris and is walking into the living room. The door to my children's room is locked behind me, and I deposit each to their respective crib. I place my finger on my mouth and both of them hide under their blanket.

"Are we playing, papa?" Natalie asks me quietly. I manage to nod. "Okay!" Her soft squeak still makes me nervous, but I tell them to be quiet again. Will decides to hide under his pillow as well, only keeping a portion of his face uncovered in order to breathe. I cover my eyes and hear their soft giggles. I take a deep breath and go find Tris.

The living room is so silent, you can hear each labored breath I try to take. I stop at the entry of the hall, near the kitchen, refusing to come ten feet near him. Marcus is looking around, somehow missing I'm in the same room. Tris, on the contrary, immediately sees me and stifles a squeak. She's pulling me onto the kitchen when Marcus speaks up.

"Tobias," he clears his throat. "Son." I cross my arms, and Tris tries to pull me again, unsuccessfully. "How are you?" I feel Tris shifting from foot to foot, not sure of whether she should stay with us, or run to the kids. I shake my head softly and she stands behind me, understanding my body language easily.

"Marcus." I say curtly. How can I speak to him? How does he expect me to chat with him as if we had a stable father-to-son relationship? "What are you doing here? What do you want from us?" I can no longer think or speak for myself. I speak up for my kids, for my wife-to-be. And although I am terrified of him, I must protect them. Who else could stand up to him?

"I saw you the other day," he tells me, smiling softly. I didn't know he could smile. "And I realized we hadn't talked in a long time." He pauses. The silence threatens to swallow me whole, and all I want is for him to leave. "You looked like you were in a hurry, so I decided not to bother you," he smiles again, and the look I give him only encourages him to broaden his smile. "But I asked around, to a couple of my old acquaintances and such, and they told me they'd seen you walking around this area. I found you easily after that."

"Which acquaintances? The dead ones from Abnegation?" I say harshly, momentarily blinded by my anger. I try to take it back after knowing how this blow will land on Tris. Marcus, he doesn't have feelings. He won't feel anything. But Tris. She's not likely to admit it, but she's hurting all the time. Over her parents, and everything that happened since Jeanine started her stupid war against the faction that held some answers about our world. I decide to make him feel bad, but I know it won't work. "The acquaintances you got killed? Is that who you spoke to?"

"I killed no one!" He yells forcefully, half-standing, half-sitting. His hands are balled into fists, and I stand up straighter, my body responding to his outburst. If he so much as starts a commotion, I'll end up doing something I might not want my kids to see. "I killed no one." He says with a normal voice.

"Oh, you didn't?" I retort. I'm an adult now. I shouldn't be afraid of him. But then, why am I shaking? I don't what him to see me. "So you weren't selfish that day? You weren't selfish the day your faction was attacked and some died under the hands of the Dauntless when they were under the simulation? You could have died for them and you chose to leave!" Now I'm the one with fists resting at my sides.

"That wasn't my idea!"

"Who are you going to blame? And if you dare to say it was anyone other than yourself, you're a liar."

"But it truly wasn't my idea. It was Andrew's. All I did was follow his selfish motives. He convinced people to leave others behind. He only thought to save himself and Natalie. He had nothing to lose anymore apart from her. Their children left them for other factions, so they wanted nothing with the Abnegation." He looks serious, but I see him sneak a look at Tris, and his eyes are mocking, then he lowers his head to pretend to be sad.

I take big strides to the couch in which he is sitting, and I pull at his shirt roughly, forcing him to get up with a yelp. "Shut up." He looks at me dead in the eyes, and I know he's just saying this to make Tris feel bad. She hasn't spoken a single word since I started talking to him. I feel her moving in the kitchen, but I can't see her when I look around quickly. "Get the fuck out of my house." I growl.

"Don't you speak to me like that, Tobias, understand?" He says with venom in his voice.

"And don't you set another foot in my home, or near me or my wife, understand?" I say, more coldly and angrily than I possibly imagined I could sound. I don't want him near us, I don't want to be his son, and I don't want him to be related to my children. My beautiful children, who were born out of love, not hatred or anger. I let him go, expecting him to leave. I'm completely wrong.

"I know you have a family. And the more you try to hide it from me, and from your mother, the more obvious it is. All I ask from you is that you allow me to see them. Allow me to meet my grandchildren, Tobias." He pleads with me.

Before I can utter a single word, Tris beats me to it. "No." It's solid and unwavering, and I smile, admiring her strength. It'll take more than Marcus to get her down.

"I'm not talking to you, little girl." Marcus says with disgust. "I was talking to –" I stop him by punching him square in the jaw.

"I said, get the fuck out of my house!" I say angrily, taking him once again by the shirt and pulling him along with me. I open the door gruffly, and I hesitate for a second before I throw him out of the house without so much as a warning. I plant myself in front of the door, daring him to try to come in again. He gives me a cold look, and cradles his left arm. I must have broken it when I threw him out. He's also sporting a bleeding lip, and I smile at him, glad I made my message clear. He gives me another dirty look before finally hobbling away.

Tris comes up and hugs me from behind. I think she's shaking, but once her sobs become more loud and profound, I know she's crying. Her grip on me is strong, and I have to talk to her in order to get her to loosen up. As soon as she lets go of me a little, I close the door and lock it. I quickly turn around and hold her against me, her tiny body flush to mine. All I do is rub her back. No matter what I do, she won't get those disgusting words out of her head. Even knowing that her parents were the most selfless people in her life, their memory has been slightly tainted by what Marcus said.

Tris will feel guilty, because she and Caleb left them. Because she saw them die for her. She will heed Marcus' words in the middle of the night, when the guilt comes for her all the time. She probably won't sleep for about a week now, and all because Marcus loves to hurt people. Power does take people to dark places. Tris told me her father said that to her once.

She begins to calm down after a while, and I don't even bother to talk to her, she won't listen to me. All she wants right now is my comfort. And so I give it to her. It is good thing I woke up early today, because I'll have to make sure Tris is up to caring for the kids before I head to work. Tris reaches for the tissues by the table, and I stretch a little and quickly hand her the entire box. She giggles softly, then uses about a thousand of them, emptying the box.

"You think you're gonna be alright with the kids?" I ask her after she blows her nose one last time. She only nods. "Tris, are you sure?" Her nod this time around is more firm, and I smile at her. I kiss her check, then her nose, then her forehead, and she manages to give out a weak laugh before she gets up and goes for the kids. That's when I notice the pain on my knuckles. I hadn't punched someone in a long time.

Before the kids were born – two years, to be exact – Tris and I would practice fighting, as if we were still in Dauntless. But after that, we sort of let it go. The most recent action either of us had seen was when Uriah got punched by Tris. I look down at my hand, surprised. I punched Marcus so hard, I busted open two of my knuckles. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. The pain is unbearable, and I end up laughing and crying. I'm in hysterics, because I don't know what to do. I'm holding my hand with my other, making strange noises while still sitting in the couch. Tris comes in with the kids to find me in tears.

"Papa!" My kids scream, not sure of what's happening to me.

"Oh, God, Tobias," Tris also comes to me, concerned.

"What is that, papa?" Curious Will strikes again. He's about to touch it when I shake my head.

"Does it hurt?" Both Tris and Natalie ask me.

"No, but thank you for your concern, beautiful ladies." Tris blushes and Natalie giggles. Will looks at me, confused. "I need you to help me, Will." He nods immediately. "Your mom is going to clean my hand, so I really need you to hug me so I doesn't hurt, okay?" Another nod, this time, more eager. I guess he wants to be the tough guy this time around. "But you have to hug me really hard, or else it will really hurt."

"Can I hug you too, papa?" Natalie climbs onto the couch, getting ahead of my response.

"Sure you can," I get them to hug me, and my children stretch their arms as much as they can and squeeze me as hard as possible. "I need this." I say sheepishly when I notice Tris looks at me with amusement. She has a box with her. It's the box we got a week after the kids learned how to walk. They were bound to get injured, so we took precautions.

My hand is in a small bandage, wrapped around it tightly. I'm Dauntless again. I'm ready to go to work, and I get kisses from everyone, especially from the kids, telling me to be careful with my hand. And if my 'red water' hurts, I should come home. I laugh as I leave, remembering how the kids stopped hugging me and decided to help Tris in clearing and bandaging my hand.

I spot him at the corner of the latest construction project. Marcus Eaton is now accompanied by some of the Abnegation government leaders that survived the Dauntless attack years ago. The minute he points me out to them, they look away from me. Sometimes I miss them, but at times like these, I'm frustrated by their easy persuasion. The moment he steps closer to me, the rest of them do the same. What are the even here with him for? To support him? To make him feel more important?

"Son." He conveys hurt, and pain, but I know it's just a charade. He made fun of the Priors not less than five hours ago. He mocked a person because of her dead parents. "I came here, with my faction as my witnesses. Grant me permission to see them, to hold them, to get to know my grandchildren. You cannot rob your father of such a privilege."

_Run, boy, run. This world is not made for you. _And just when I thought I was escaping him. I can never outrun this man. I am tied to him, because he is my father, because we share the same blood. I don't know how I'll react if I speak, therefore, I ignore him and the rest of the grey-clad people in front of me. I can see Marcus get surrounded by them out of the corner of my eye. They will not yell at me, because they are not that type of people, but them providing Marcus comfort for something he doesn't deserve makes me seethe.

I keep walking and enter the construction site. I pick up a toolbox, and one of the other guys there, Jason, hands me several other supplies. I put on a plastic hat, and with a huff, head back out to the exterior. It's my turn to help with the outside, meaning that if Marcus is still there, he'll still be able to pester me. Either way, I can't let that affect me. We're building this house, and thanks to me and some of the other guys, we were able to get ahead of time. At this rate, more people will have places to live in, and we'll forget the word 'factionless'.

He's still there, sitting down on the floor, surrounded by the Abnegation. They are still the Abnegation, dressing with their same shoes and shirts and pants, wearing their short haircuts, or their tucked hair. They get lost in their monotone hues, and I cannot tell them apart. They are still a faction, they are still their own community. That stops them from being a part of us, a part of this new society. They are the new factionless, social outcasts, because they chose to remain in their own world, in their own beliefs.

Marcus looks up to find me staring, and he quickly gets up, taking advantage of my opening like a hungry dog. "Tobias," there's hope in his eyes, and I don't know what to make of it. "Please." I can't look at him. He is a liar, and if I look at him, I will give in. I'm still afraid; of his voice, his temper, his belt, his fists. I may be taller than him, and stronger than him, but I am not _stronger_ than him. "They are my family, and they deserve to meet their grandfather."

"Why?" I reply before thinking. I know I won't like where this is going. "So you can beat them too? So you can beat them like you did to me? To make them afraid?" I growl, making the Abnegation gasp. Many of them look away from me, and it angers me at first. But I notice that they refuse to look at Marcus too. What does this mean for him? I feel my face heating up, and I decide to stop shouting. I'll just talk to him instead, the same way he did when he was angry. "I let you beat me, when I was in that house, because if I spoke up, I was selfish. But now, you're threatening my family, and my wife. You're attacking her by shoving Andrew and Natalie in her face. They were good people. These people here, supporting you? They're good people too, and you're lying to them, just like when you beat me, and Evelyn. I won't let you hurt me, or my family anymore. If you come near us, I will beat you. I'll make sure you can't move again." I don't turn around, or storm away. I just pick up my supplies – some that I must have dropped during my angry outburst – and start to work.

Since I got here early, I work on the wall with the wood on my own. I set long sticks at specific intervals, having learned from Jason. He's the head of the project, and when I was sent to him, I didn't know how to use half of the things I use now. He's been a great friend since day one, and I couldn't ask for a better person to work for.

"Tobias?" I smile when I hear his voice, because I can't believe he's my friend. "How did you come by so early? It's not even noon!" Peter whines.

Let me say a thing or two about Peter. I wouldn't know how to begin, or how to explain it, but Peter isn't the blunt Candor-Dauntless hybrid from before. After he took the memory serum, he became my friend. A lost child, because he wanted to be less cruel and less manipulating. He wanted a fresh start, and I had the power to help him when we got back to Chicago. I was supposed to give it to either one of my parents, but I gave it to Peter instead. You can't change every cruel person, but if you can change one, you do it. Over time, I guess, I grew fond of him. He was playful, and friendly. I see him as the cruel initiate that beat up Tris, and the joking friend I have now. I can tell him apart, but I find it difficult to do it.

"Yeah, Hayes, I wake up early. Unlike you, I take my job seriously." I grin at him. I still linger on my conversation with Marcus a few minutes ago. I know I can't let it spoil my day. Not when I have two little ones waiting for me at home. Small joys in the form of children with little hands, and tiny feet, with curly locks or blonde hair, with giggles, and laughs and games.

"Shut up," Peter says, once he's back with his own supplies and tools.

"You forgot your hat." I tell him, laughing.

"You're not my dad, you can't tell me what to do." He scoffs. He stands there like an idiot for a few seconds, then he whines all the way as he goes looking for a hat.

"Did you just do what I told you to do?" I mock him, making him scowl more.

"Just shut up." He shoves me, then begins to laugh. I laugh with him. Peter jokes too much.

"Excuse me?" A soft voice asks. I turn around, not knowing who to look for. A single Abnegation man stands out, standing alone near our construction site. "Marcus Eaton's son, Tobias. You shouldn't treat your father as such. It is not right to disrespect your elders." His voice is soft, as if he were talking to a misbehaving child. The Abnegation almost always talk like this.

"I'm sorry?" I grit my teeth as I reply. I don't want to disrespect him because of Marcus. He has nothing to do with this. I calm myself before I speak. "With all due respect, I cannot allow you to meddle in something you have no clue about. Everything Marcus has ever told you, since the city was reset and you looked to him for answer. You may think they are old rumors, or the lies of a child, or a faction's way to attack a leader. That is not the case. What I said about him, back there? It's true. I may not be an Abnegation anymore. And I'd frankly belong in Candor, if we were still in the faction system." He gasps.

Marcus told them all, even though we erased the whole city's memories. He 'gave them their life back' by telling them what they'd just escaped. Everyone relearned about the old life, but Marcus put them under him again. He abused his power as leader once more and took advantage of people that needed help.

"But I gain nothing if I lie to you. I'm being honest, and if that's not good enough for you, I don't know what to say to you." I almost laugh in his face, because his expression is of shock. The situation is serious, and that stops me from joking. Even Peter is silent this time. The man is still standing there when I resume my work. Peter pokes me to let me know. I punch him in the arm to let him know I what him to leave me alone. "I'm taking a small break," I mutter to no one in particular, as Peter is using a loud tool.

I sneak a look at the man, who is still standing, looking at me. He is no longer wearing that shocked expression of his, but he's still standing. I look around, and the Abnegation are still huddled, comforting Marcus. Since less ten minutes have passed, I'm not surprised they've barely moved. The man looks familiar when I inspect him closely. He used to work with Marcus, and he's one of the few Abnegation leaders that survived the Dauntless attack. Jonathan Nelson.

"Mr. Nelson, I suggest you go home. It gets hot on the afternoons, and if you're just going to be still, I suggest you take the rest of these people with you. I wouldn't want any of you to get sick, or suffer from too much heat." I approach him after a while, and once again he is shocked that I know his name. I was 'reclusive' when I lived with my father, and the community did not know me, not my face, not me.

"You should give you father the opportunity to meet your family. He means you no wrong."

"He actually does." I close my eyes tightly, wishing the voice to be a trick of the wind. I'm not in much luck today, am I? I open my eyes when I feel a hand resting on my cheek. "Tobias." My mother says with a smile on her face. "Get back to work, don't let your father stop you from doing what you want to do."

"Evelyn."

"Jonathan."

"I'm leaving. I have a house to build."

"We do have to catch up, Tobias. I have something I need to return to you." Evelyn speaks loudly this time. She turns heads, especially Marcus'. "I think you know what it is. After all, it was the only thing you had left of me when I escaped your father's beatings."

"The sculpture?"

"Your children will love it."

"I'm sure they will. When I finish today's work, you can come with me, if you'd like. It's time you met your grandkids." I don't know why I say it. I'm not one to tease people with childish games, or one to make someone feel bad with words. I do it with my fists, or with actions. But something drives me to hurt Marcus. Anything I do to make him hurt will never erase the pain, the scars, the fear, and the memories that tie him to my bleeding childhood and teenage years. But I want to hurt him, in any way possible. And if granting Evelyn passage to my life, to my family, then so be it. I'm not sure if I'll be able to keep my promise, but my mother's eyes are shining, and I smile at her.

"I'll get the sculpture as soon as I can. I just need a word with several people here." A firm nod and a smile before she walks away with Nelson. The rest of the Abnegation group on the floor look up to her as I once more continue to build the foundation of a wall.

"You belong in a drama book." Peter hasn't stopped bothering me for the past couple of hours, and I silently thank him for giving me this many laughs. On the outside, I pretend to be annoyed.

"It was funny the first time. And the second and third. But you have to draw the line, Hayes!" I bark, throwing Peter into a laughing fit. "I'm not having a good day today."

"That's not nice, man," Peter puts a hand on his chest. "You've seen me." I roll my eyes. "That should be enough to brighten the rest of your life."

"I have Tris for that," I reply, bragging. "I don't need you."

"That's rude," Peter says as he picks up his supplies. "Even for you."

"Did I mention today's not my day?"


	7. Backwards

**I'M BACK FOR A SECOND CHAPTER Y'ALL! Okay, so I got to do some crazy writing at midnight and I just finished. Another chapter and you didn't have to wait a month. I have a lot to say about this chapter. 1 - It's ultimate rubbish. As I mentioned, I mostly wrote this at _midnight_ which guarantees that I wasn't even functioning properly while writing (4am is not a good time) and so this happened. 2 - I am ultra indecisive, and that also resulted in indecisive Tobias. He can't make up his mind _at all_. So sorry again for being trash! 3 - You're meeting Peter! And boy do I love this Peter. He's kinda very much alike movie!Peter, with his sarcasm and all. But I also gave him his own little thing. 4 - Screw mama and papa Eaton, because they suck. I don't know when I'll be posting, but I hope it's really soon. I know you'll hate me for this shitty chapter, so I can't tell you to enjoy it. Not this time! Also, extremely friendly reminder that I'm only borrowing these characters. They belong to Veronica, not me. Stay radiant, precious flowers xx!**

Evelyn is cradling the sculpture at the corner of the block, waiting for me to finish work. Her smile is shy, and I shove m injured hand onto my pocket, feeling like a child that hides an injury from their parent to avoid a scolding. I smile at her as well, and we walk together, in a soft silence.

"I know that you only invited me to come because you wanted to bother him." Evelyn begins. "So I'll completely understand if you only take the sculpture and ask me to go away." I look at her. "I did want to give it to you, if I'm honest."

"Why?"

"It's a reminder to stay strong. It helped you back then, and it'll surely help you now. It will always help you." She pauses awkwardly. I breathe quietly, letting her collect her thoughts. I'm not going to simply let her slide back into my life, but I am willing to listen. I'd take her over Marcus any day. She left me, but that's in the past. I'm willing to rebuild something with her. "I know I left you, and I shouldn't have done that. But I wanted to get out. I didn't take you with me; that would have made you factionless as well. I didn't want to take that away from you."

"You based your decision on something you thought I might choose?" I can't help but blur out. "Seriously?" I look at her, incredulous. "And what if I'd stayed in Abnegation?"

"I knew you wouldn't." Evelyn replies immediately.

"But what if I had stayed? Would you have left me still?"

"Tobias, that's not what I meant." She tries to appease me. I can tell from her tone that this is not how she imagined the conversation would go. Big surprise, neither did I. I wanted to play nice. But I'm not accepting her terrible lie of an excuse; I simply won't.

"Then what did you mean? Hm?" I take it back. I'll take neither of them any day. No Marcus and no Evelyn. I don't need them to live anymore. I'm no longer a child. I don't need them. I have Tris, and Will and Natalie. I don't need anyone else.

Evelyn takes her time to reply. "I just... I don't know, Tobias, but I didn't want to strip you from your choice. That's something that you had a right to the minute you were born. All of us had it, because that's the world we were born into. I didn't want to take it away from. You would have only lived your life as an Abnegation child, and then what? Be factionless because it was a quick escape? I immediately said no to that."

"There's a reason I chose you," I pinch the bridge of my nose as I walk. This day has been stressful. It's like they both agreed to come and aggravate me on the same day. "When we were getting ready to put the city under the memory serum, there was a reason as to why I chose to give you a free pass and let you keep your memories. But you're just like Marcus. You only look out for yourself. That's all you've ever done."

"Tobias, I honestly promise that it was never that. I didn't want to curse my only child to the factionless life. Your name, it had, it still has, power. And if you went with it to factionless, it could have killed you. People might have known me, but I had a way to hide if I chose to remain hidden. Evelyn Johnson. But you, you are an Eaton. And that would have made you a target. You know what your father inflicted upon people."

"I have no idea how Marcus escaped the serum," I keep talking, ignoring Evelyn's reply. "But I'm already regretting helping you escape it too. I don't know what's been going on lately, but I've been having terrible days, and I feel like I'm only going backwards. I really wanted to let you in, but I'm changing my mind. When Marcus was there, and I was able to hurt him with my words, every part of me said to go ahead. I got my hopes up again, Evelyn. But I can't believe you're just as manipulating and controlling as Marcus. I'm not letting you take me backwards, not anymore."

"Son," the pain in Evelyn's voice catches my attention. "You have a right to believe in whatever you want. And you have a right to hate us. I hope one day, you understand why I chose to leave you behind, and one day, you can forgive me as well." She pauses, and when I see her, she seems to be debating on saying something. Apparently, it wins. "Maybe not in the same day, though. That would surely be too much for the great Tobias Eaton." She finishes with a soft chuckle.

"Yeah, one day." I mutter, acknowledging that I heard her. She smiles at me, and I stop outside of my house.

"This is where you live?" She looks up at the Abnegation like house. It's not decorated, or colored. The difference between the Abnegation houses and mine is that mine radiates warmth, and happiness. Safety, even. Or that could be from the fact that it's my house, and since I live in it with the three most wonderful people in the world, I feel it oozing out of it? "It's beautiful."

"Thank you." I say politely before remembering that I'm supposed to be angry. I do feel slightly proud, at the moment. Proud of my life, and my home, and my family. I won't let her see it, though. "I suppose that now that you know where I live, you're going to show up whenever you want."

"No." She tells me firmly. "Unless you want me to. I'm not Marcus. I won't impose myself on you. I'm going to respect you. But if I do want to see your family before you give me permission to, I'll call to ask if it's alright." She says confidently.

"Sure you will." I retort sarcastically.

"I will!" She replies in exasperation.

"You're right, though, if that comforts you." I want to be angry, at her, at Marcus, at both of them for being terrible parents and making me be so afraid.

"Right on what?" She asks me, clueless.

"You're nothing like Marcus." I look at her, eager for her reaction. A corner of her mouth is starting to lift into a triumphant smile, but I'm not done yet. "You're worst." Her half smile immediately vanishes, replaced by a deep frown. She doesn't answer, and after a few seconds, I see her trying to clear her face of emotions. Her mouth is in a tight line, and I smirk mentally. Once she's gone, I'll savior the moment. She gives me the sculpture without another word and then walks away. I wait until I see she's turning at the corner and then immediately clutch the sculpture closer to me. I forget to savior the moment, I'm so wrapped up in the sculpture.

It could be that it reminds me of the desperation I had when I left it for my father in my monotone, Abnegation room. Or it could be that it does remind me of beauty, but from the heart. It makes me feel rebellious to hold it once more. This sculpture was so much and yet, so little. It was the last piece I had of my mother when she left. It was a reminder that although we could not be selfish, we could still be. It represents finding beauty in the simplest of things, and you can only do that when your life is so monotone, and so 'not yours'. I decide to keep it. Not to satisfy Evelyn's wishes. Oh, it's so much more than that. I want it back because it holds so much for me. My anger at both of my parents, my frustration to get out of that house, my fear for the man who called himself my father, the resentment I felt for the woman who abandoned me. And it could turn out to represent even more; I keep digging, searching for more reasons. Freedom, not oppression. I was free to think what I wanted because I kept it a secret when it was handed to me.

I keep holding on to my past, and if there's one thing Tris has told me after all this time, it's that it'll make me more angry, resentful, and lonely than how I was when I made it in Dauntless. Even with my family, I won't be who I want to because I'm holding onto all of these dark feelings. I remember Johanna telling Tris to not let her anger consume her, because it would take her down a road she would most likely not want to go down. But if she chose to go there, there would be no coming back. Even I can't keep myself under control. Especially not after today. I was so good at in Dauntless, but it's different now. I didn't ask for it, but it's the way it is.

I heft the sculpture from hand go hand, unsure if how I'll present it to Tris. I blunt in, choosing to surprise her with it and see what she makes of it. I open the door, expecting to find the kids in bed, and Tris crashed out on the couch, waiting for me. I get a surprise myself.

Big squeals and giggles greet me as tiny hands tug at my jacket, my pants, and my hand. Well, the one free of the sculpture, that is. I quickly set the sculpture on the couch, careful to not randomly toss it, and then let myself be led away by the tiny children I have to stoop down to for this to work. I laugh as they pull me along, immediately forgetting about the troubles of today.

"Papa, come look!" Will tells me excitedly. At first, I was letting myself get pulled on, but I decide to give the kids a second look. They're covered in a blast of colors, and whatever it is, it's all over the place. Their hair, their clothes, their faces, and their hands. Will's smile shows me his little teeth, and I decide to just go along with it. If they're messy, it must be because Tris allowed it.

They rush me to their room, and from the slightly opened door, I can hear Tris giggling. What happened today? What did they do? Natalie's face is adorable when I look at it. She's huffing, pulling me along with her brother. Even though I'm complying, I must still be heavy to haul around.

"Wait here." Natalie tells me with a sneaky grin once we're outside their door. Will pokes his head in, waiting for a signal, I guess. Then they both go in and slam the door in my face. I laugh at this, and then lean on the wall of the hall before sliding down and sitting. I wait for a while, and I can hear Tris' muffled voice telling the kids what to do next. Well, I assume that, because I can't really hear anything. I want to go to bed, but I'm waiting for my surprise. If they find me sleeping, they'll be disappointed. To keep awake, I think that in two days' time, I'll have all the time in the world to play with my kids.

"Okay, come!" The twins tell me excitedly.

"But close your eyes. Or else it doesn't count." Tris adds to the list of demands. I almost don't do it, because I could end up falling on the kids. I do it because they're waiting for me to close my eyes before pulling me into the room. I stumble along, laughing at my clumsiness. The kids crash me onto their rocking chair, and I wince at the sharp pain. They let me go, and I stand there until Tris laces her hand on mine.

"Open them," Tris whispers excitedly, sending shivers down my spine. "You can open your eyes now." Her voice is low, and she giggles sheepishly. I look at her, cocking an eyebrow. She pushes me with a cheeky wink and then points at what's behind me. I decide to find out what got her in this mood later, then I turn around to find my surprise.

I cry immediately. What I find in front of me is so precious and so tender, the only reaction is to cry away. Tris and the kids used a giant cloth, like a table-sized one, and painted us. It's obvious that Tris helped them out, but the creativity and enthusiasm my children put onto the drawing is palpable. The kids see my reaction and decide to join me. And that results in Tris joining us as well. I try to stop my sobbing, because now I've ruined what was supposed to be an enjoyable surprise.

We stay there, hugging each other and crying. Me, because of the beauty of my family, and my children and Tris because of me. Hours or minutes, I do not know, but we cry for some time. The kids get tired and fall asleep while crying. I take that as my cue to stop. Tris picks up Natalie, and I take Will. Once they're in their cribs, we head out to the living room. Tris takes me there, and I know she'll want to know what got me so sentimental. Her playful mood is gone, and she's entirely focused on me.

Tris caresses my face, calming me. She wipes my tears away, using her thumbs in swift strokes, as if she were still painting, but on my face. It feels so good, that I let out a brittle sigh. This makes her laugh, but once I open my eyes again, she looks at me seriously, waiting for me to explain.

"Marcus followed me to work." I begin, tense and tired. I don't want to talk about it, but knowing Tris, she'll want to know. "And he did it with some of the Abnegation." She doesn't interrupt me, and regardless of me wanting to keep this to myself, it'll be no use. "Then he used one of the Abnegation to try to convince me to let him see the kids." Tris' face is heavy with emotions. The most obvious one is anger, but I see a mix of disgust and disbelieve as well. "And then, after an hour or two, Evelyn showed up." That makes Tris roll her eyes. "I wanted to make Marcus angry, so I invited Evelyn over." I mumble the rest.

"What?" Tris explodes at this. "Did you consider me in this?"

"She didn't come in." I say quickly, defending myself. "And I told her that I don't want her to come in."

"But she saw where we live, did she?" Tris asks incredulously. I avoid making eye contact, and that confirms what she didn't want to hear. "She'll come. I know it."

"I know it too. I'm sorry." I don't know what to say to appease her. This is not something she's going to forget. If I could exchange her parents for mine, I'd definitely do it. Without a trace of a doubt. "She gave me something, you know."

"What could she possibly have that you'd want?" Tris questions.

I point at the sculpture on the other side of the couch, and Tris and I stare at it for a while, as if we expect it to explode or begin to punch us. Tris begins to look at it gloomily, not sure of what we'd do with the blue piece. I grabbed it on instinct, but now that it's here, I don't know what to do with it, much less a place for it. Tris picks up gingerly, and with delicacy and curiosity. She was always so curious; she still is.

"I've seen this before," she tells me, grabbing my attention. "Is this yours?"

"It is." I reply before posing a question myself. "Where have you seen it?"

"Remember when we were waiting to hear for Marcus' and Evelyn's verdicts?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"We were at the airport."

"I recall."

"And I saw it there. Evelyn had it with her, and one time, when she was on her room, alone, she was caressing it. I remember thinking it looked like a waterfall or something."

"The first time Evelyn gave it to me, that's exactly what I told her." Its story time again. "And I asked her what it was for. She told me that it was simply mine for beauty. It had no actual purpose except to admire it. It held a sort of magic for me. And I calmed me when she pretended to be dead. I used it to say goodbye to Marcus. On the day I chose Dauntless over Abnegation, I left it on my table, out in the open. If he walked into my room, it would have been the first thing he'd have seen. I did it because he'd beaten me the night before, and I wanted to get back at him."

"He beat you before your Choosing Ceremony?"

"The night before. He was going to punch me in the face, but I reminded him about me having to choose the following day. He came back with a belt." I don't want to go on. Tris runs her thumb across my lips, and then kisses me. It's soft and gentle, and I smile under it. I decide to change the subject by breaking the kiss to ask her something. "Why were you so playful when you showed me the painting?"

"Oh," she blushes. "Because." Her mouth is moving, but she's not speaking. Kind of like a fish out of water.

I smirk. "Well, if you had something specific in mind..." She looks at me with wide eyes, then buries herself on my chest. "Hey, Tris?"

"Hm?"

"The kids fell asleep with paint all over them. You're okay with that?"

"Hm."

"Also, where did the paint come from?"

"It was a gift, from Robert. I think. It was several containers and they were with the stuff they got from Susan."

"Something like that, then."

We're still laying on the couch, me wrapping my arms around Tris as she snuggles closer to me. I want to close my eyes badly, but if we end up sleeping in the couch we'll forget to wake up tomorrow. Tris' breathing tells me she's fallen asleep already, and with the warmth her small frame is providing, I'm feeling the pull of sleep on me too.

A firm knock on the door makes me open my drowsy eyes, and Tris shifts closer to me; a bit more and she'll end up on my lap. I try to pry her off of me before I get up to open the door. A mental image of me carrying her the way I carry the kids comes into my mind. I chuckle as I imagine her reaction to that. If I carry her, she'd probably end up not talking to me for a long time. I decide to risk it and since she's so light and small, I carry her easily. I almost burst into laughter when she wraps her legs around me and sighs deeply, continuing to sleep. The knocks at the door become more insistent, making me hurry to the door.

"My god, I thought you guys weren't – oh." Christina is about to give me an angry lecture but stops abruptly when she sees Tris. Uriah is right behind her, bringing up a small suitcase, as they'll be staying over. Uriah also sees Tris in my arms, and opens his mouth to make a comment. After five seconds, he decides to say nothing and closes his mouth while looking away.

"Just come in." I say, biting my lip to stop myself from laughing. "And don't even think about ever talking about this ever again. Tris would murder me." They both nod and I move aside to let them in. "Just so you know, we we're very tired and we fell asleep on the couch," I explain sheepishly.

"Hey, man, we saw nothing." Uriah says with a mocking smile on his face and Christina runs to the guest room before laughing loudly. "But you should stop what you're doing," he says matter-of-factly. "Because she's not your child. She's your wife." And now he's running to the guest room with the suitcase in tow.

Tris grips my neck tightly, and that's when I realize I've been rocking Tris in my arms, as if she were a baby. I stop immediately, and when I do, Tris grunts until I start moving again. I make my way to our room, then laugh softly when I try to put Tris in the bed and she wraps herself tighter against me. I have to pry her off of me, and once I do, she curls up into a ball and resumes sleeping. I run to the bathroom to brush my teeth, and then I make my way into the bed. I don't realize how tired I am until my head hits the pillow, and I'm immediately asleep.

Matthew arrives with Cara the following morning. Tris is nervous as to where Cara will sleep, because she also brought a suitcase, but Matthew says that he found a place with one of George's old Dauntless friends and that he's going to drop off their things while Cara stays with us. Will and Natalie are static due to all the commotion going on around the house. Four new people to play with tends to get a child excited. While Natalie goes to Christina and Uriah, Will surprises me by walking up to Cara. His curiosity got him to go to her, but he's shy around her, as it's the first time he's meeting her.

"Will? Natalie? Come get your cereal!" Tris calls from the kitchen, forgetting about Cara being here. We haven't tell her the kids' names. Cara's reaction is immediate. I can see her trying to process my son's name. Christina pushes Natalie softly, along with Will, towards the kitchen, and once they get going, she goes to Cara. Uriah and I stand there awkwardly, until Uriah decides to follow the kids.

"Your problem, man," Uriah says under his breath, walking quickly. "Sorry."

"We named him after your brother," I say without missing a beat, and Christina gives me an incredulous look before getting up and following Uriah. Before I can utter another word, Christina is hauling Tris out of the kitchen and onto the couch. Tris gives me the green light and I rush to the kitchen, happy to go look after the kids. I know Tris can't face this alone, but something tells me she wants to. Who am I to decide her battles for her? We stopped doing that to each other a long time ago. We're no longer teenagers, deciding for each other. We're adults, and we're parents. What we decide and choose affects our children. That's what we worry about now. Cara takes the news well, and alike Christina when she found out, she thanks Tris and then chats with Will for a while. They call her aunt Cara and Christina laughs and jokes and says that that makes Matthew their uncle.

After the kids eat their cereal and are having fun with the girls in the living room, I get ready for another day at the construction site. After this, it's one more day to go and then I get my break. I get a lot of breaks, now that I think about it. It could be because I volunteer the most, and they don't want to scare me off by having me work too much. Tris says it's because the people know me, and want me to spend time with the kids.

Cara, Uriah, Matthew, Christina, and Tris are with the kids on the floor by the time I'm walking out the door. The laughter and giggles and loudness of my children reassures me they'll be fine while I'm gone. I'm slightly jealous that they're having such a fun time without me, but they catch me and Tris saying goodbye at the door and they run over to hug me and wish me a good day.

Peter provides me with a lot of good humor while working, so the day flies by faster than I imagine, and once I sneak a peek at the timer near the tools and supplies, I'm amazed to see we're done for the day. Everyone else begins to pack up their tools and put away the unused supplies. I stay behind, making sure everything is in place and that nothing is missing. Peter stays with me, and we finish by picking up the garbage, supplies, and tools everyone else overlooked.

"Hey, sorry I forgot about going to your kids' party," he apologizes when we put the last box of wood on top of the other boxes. "I did get them some presents and everything. Something came up and I couldn't go. I did bring their presents with me, so I'll give them to you, hang on."

"Why don't you come over now?"

"Could I? Is Tris going to be alright with that?" He asks, concern clear on his face.

"Why wouldn't she be okay with that?" I ask, perplexed.

"I don't know," he shrugs, and for a second, the old Peter is back. The way he lifted his shoulder, as if he were indifferent to anyone's opinion but his own. "You celebrated their birthday several months back. Me turning up out of the blue to give them presents would be a bit weird, don't you think?" And he's back to being the new Peter, the Peter that he is now. I have to remember that although he doesn't remember who he is, he's not a whole different person because of his memory being erased. His quirks are still his, and they'll come up because he's still himself, even if he doesn't, he can't, remember.

"I'm sure she will. I'll call her." I pick up the only phone near the tools and punch in a few numbers, then I put it up to my ear and wait for Tris to pick it up.

"Hello?" Christina answers, breathless.

"Hey, it's Four." I say while Peter gives me a questioning look. I wave him off and keep talking. "Could you put Tris on the line?"

"Sure," Christina still struggles to breathe. "Hang on." She puts the phone down, but since she yells, I can hear everything she says. "Tris! Four is calling you! Come, I'll finish cooking, don't worry, Uriah and Cara have the kids!" I smile, and Peter decides to get his things, waiting for Tris' answer. "She's coming." Christina says one more time before putting the phone down for the last time and helping Tris finish dinner.

"Hey!" Tris sounds cheerful, and I grin widely.

"You look happy," Peter says sarcastically.

"Be quiet, Peter." I reply quickly, and Tris laughs. "As you've heard, I'm with Peter."

Peter pulls my arm, moving the phone away from my face and yells into it. "Yeah, he's going to leave you to become my lover! I didn't mean for it to happen but I'm too handsome to resist!"

"Shut up!" I pull my hand out of his grasp and smack him in the back of the head with the other. When I put the phone back to my ear again, Tris' laughter is spirited. "Is it alright if he comes over? He wants to give the kids their presents."

"Isn't it a bit too late for that?" She asks me once she's calmed down.

"He just wants to drop them off and clean his conscience because he still has their presents after such a long time." I say, smirking at Peter, who pretends to be offended.

"Yeah, he can come over. Tell him he better be hungry." Tris says, giggling once again before putting the phone down for good. The receiver clicks, and I also put the phone down.

"Hope you're hungry, Tris wants you to stay for dinner." Peter smiles and nods, and once I realize what I've said, I can't help in thinking that it's all so bizarre.

Tris Prior, the girl from Dauntless, is going to let Peter Hayes, the kid who beat her up during initiation, walk into her house. And she'll give him food. Talk about things changing with time. Of course, Peter drinking the memory serum had a lot to do with all these changes, but never in a long time would I have had imagined that Tris and Peter would get along. Just thinking about how they were with each other during our time in Dauntless makes me wonder about everything. Memory serum Peter took some getting used to, but in the end, Tris managed with him. And now, here they are, as if they were old school friends or something.

"Is your house far?" Peter asks randomly.

"You forgot where I live?"

"I've only gone once. This is going to be the second time. It's also why I didn't come to the party. I forgot the way."

"Are you kidding?"

"I'm literally charming and joking the whole time, but not this once."

"Must be a record." I shove him jokingly and he laughs. "But you could have told me. I could have come and gotten you. We could have met at the house. Well, the construction house."

"It's okay. And it's crazy that I forgot to give you the presents. I feel terrible about it, you know? Those little ones probably got a lot of them, and better than the ones I got, but I still feel like I let them down, you know?" Peter gets quiet for a few seconds while we keep walking. "You think they'll like me?" He asks nervously.

"Who?"

"Your kids. Think they'll like me?" His eyes are clouded. This takes me by surprise. This whole thing is. Peter is our friend.

"Of course they will. Have you forgotten you're charming and handsome?" I appease him by joking. His eyes clear up, brighten a little, and then he grins widely.

"I haven't actually." Then he shoves me back. "But you gotta calm down around me, man. If Tris see's you this friendly with me, she'll think we're having an affair." I roar with laughter, and I'm about to reply with another sarcastic comment when I stop.

"Tobias?" Peter stops as well, noticing after a couple of steps that I wasn't following him. "Something wrong?"

"Yeah," I whisper. I motion with my hand for him to come over, and he does. "Someone's following us."

"Really? Why would you think that?" He asks and then answers his own questions. "We're hot, but not that hot, are we?" He gasps dramatically. "Are we stalking material?"

"Peter, don't get me wrong." I say, staying alert. "I love your jokes almost always," he grins knowingly but I stop him before he can say anything. "But this isn't really the time to be joking."

"Okay, okay!" But I see that his body's tense, and I know that even though he doesn't remember he used to be Dauntless, his body does. "What do we do?"

"Shut up." He nods, and his body shifts, like a sprung coil, ready to go. Mine does the same thing, and it's incredible that after all this time, it's like we're hardwired to fight. "I'll call them out, and when they do, we'll see how threatening they really are." I whisper the plan and he nods again, for once actually staying quiet. "Hey, you! Come out!" I yell into the night. Slowly, Marcus emerges from behind a tree. He has his hands in the air, as if he were surrendering. "You've got to be kidding." I should have known. Today was too good to be true. Neither he nor Evelyn bothered me all day, and know that they know where I work and where I live, they won't stop forcing themselves onto me until I let them in.

"Wasn't that man stalking you yesterday?" Peter whispers behind me.

"That stalker's my father," I say with gritted teeth.

"That's harsh, man." Although Marcus isn't threatening either one of us, we're still ready to fight. "I thought he was your biggest fan but then I remembered that's me."

"Ha." I reply, sarcastically. I'm also annoyed, but it's not Peter's fault. It's Marcus'. "What do you want, Marcus?"

"You know what I want. Please have mercy." He says immediately. Since its night, and we're in the middle of the street, the lamp doesn't shine its light this far. Therefore, his face is covered in shadows; shadows that hide who he really is. He's not human. He's a monster, a demon. And I'm not allowing a demon to step foot inside my house, or be near my children. I won't let that happen. In his eyes, I've always lived my life a rebel. And maybe I have, but only because he was trying to get at me. He is nothing but a demon, a devil. If I have to become a vigilante, a protector for my children, it'll be because of him. I'll chase him down if I have to.

"The answer will always be no. Go away."

"Tobias." He pleads.

"I said no." I reply coldly. I feel Peter's eyes on me, and I know he's looking at me differently. "Go away. I don't want to keep asking you. I've made it clear that you're got going near my children."

"I know that what I did to you in the past will never get erased. But give me a chance and I promise your children will meet the best version of me. I would never hurt them."

"You're lying."

"I'm not." He's walking towards me slowly, and I feel myself tensing up. Peter moves as well, reacting to me. "I know all you see me in me is corruption, but I swear that's behind me."

"Oh, yeah? The same way those Abnegation are?"

"You've got it all wrong."

"No, I don't." My hands are fists now. I don't want to do something I'll regret, or that will come back to haunt me and terrify my beautiful babies. I back away from Marcus and I feel Peter's hand on my shoulder reassuring me. "Now, go away. I won't ask you again."

"Don't walk away, Tobias." His voice is no longer passive. It's commanding. "You're your father, and you must listen to me!"

"Well, you'll find out I'm no longer a child!" I yell back at him and without knowing, I'm running at him. I tackle him and he grunts as we slam onto the ground. With every blow I give him, I growl out a word. "You." I hit him in the nose. "Stay." His bottom lip is already bleeding. "Away." His left eye is swelling. "From." I forget all about my own injured hand, I'm hitting him too hard. "My." I feel Peter trying to pull me away from Marcus. "Family." I manage to punch him in the jaw before Peter finally pulls me away.

"Your hand's bleeding again."

I shake it softly, as if that'll make the pain go away, and look down at my bleeding father. "That's okay. As for you," I kick him, and Peter pushes me further away from him. "You stay away. Understand?" Peter keeps pushing me, and I keep looking at Marcus until we're on another street. I notice Peter's still grabbing me, making sure I'm calm. "Thanks, Peter."

"Are you alright?"

"It's not me we should be worried about," I try to joke.

"You're right," for once, the humor goes over his head. "What will Tris think? You're bleeding." He takes a napkin from his pocket and hands it to me. "Mouth." He tells me once I raise my eyebrow. "You know, I don't know why, but I wanted to fight him too."

"Happens with everyone. Nobody can stand him."

He laughs but then turns serious. "I knew what to go for." He tells me quietly. "I didn't do anything to him, because you did, but for a second..." He looks troubled. "I knew which places I could hit to knock him out faster." His eyebrows come together and I'm at a loss as to how to reply. "But then you started hitting him and it felt wrong, you know?"

"Thanks."

"Again?"

"Yes. You pulled me away," we look at each other knowingly. "Who knows what I would have done if you hadn't."

"No problem." He mumbles.

"Also, you've graced me with your beauty, so thanks a lot, Hayes." We laugh all the way to the house.


End file.
